Alright, listen up fellow Crypto Earthlings! It has been a while since I last pontificated and tapped a few words out - so get your spacesuits dusted off, grab your Space Coffee... because we're about to embark on an enigmatic and not-so terrifying cosmic journey into the realm of cryptocurrency... on Mars. (I had to make it sound like a viral YouTube video...)
Martian Bitcoin by Along Tusk 2024
Yup Space Cadets you heard that right. We're talking about the Red Planet, where Elon Musk is busy labouring away with the skills of a thousand techies building his empire and dreaming of colonizing the heck out of it. But will cryptocurrency work in this Martian playground? Let's take a hilarious dive into the fantasy realm of technicalities and possibilities shall we?
Now before we get lightyears ahead of ourselves, let's address the big rather silver, shiny rocket in the room.
Elon Musk and his Martian ambitions
The dude's been hyping up his Mars mission like it's the ultimate theme park white knuckle ride that you tell the wife is just a kids ride. But heyho who am I to judge? If he wants to play space cowboy, and test out Mars on other bodies rather than his own... more power to him!
Mars by Along Tusk
Imagine for a moment if you wish, little Elon's SpaceX rockets blasting off, carrying eager colonists to the Martian promised land. But wait, what currency are they going to use up there? Are they going to lug around sacks of Earth dollars? Drag pallets of gold on giant space trailers? I mean that would be kinda ridiculous and bonkers don't you think? "Hey, Bob, can you pass me that bag of cash? I need to buy a ticket home."
Enter our beloved cryptocurrency, like a visitor from a galaxy far far away... and possibly, the future of Mars. But hold your space horses, folks. We're not talking about your run-of-the-mill average Bitcoin or Dogecoin here. No, no, no. We're talking about MartianCoin™️. Yup I just made that up, but hey it's got a nice ring to it don't you think?
Mars Bitcoin by Along Tusk
I can hear your Space Senses tingling, you might be wondering, "But seriously now... how the heck is cryptocurrency gonna work on Mars?" This is were things are about to get geeky.
Here on Earth our humble cryptocurrency relies on a huge decentralized network of computers called a blockchain to verify and record transactions, all at the click of a mouse. But here's the space-ball kicker... Mars ain't exactly known for its stellar internet connection... And not even Elon can yet guarantee a smooth running Martian Internet.
So unless Elon plans on a genius GPRS MarsLink (my copyright Elon), then installing Wi-Fi routers and 8G communication towers all over the Martian surface (which, let's be honest, wouldn't surprise me at this point), we're gonna have some technical hurdles to overcome.
Starship by Along Tusk 2024
I can just imagine it now: "Sorry, Dave, your MartianCoin (TM... Mr Elon) transaction is stuck in space traffic. Looks like you'll have to wait a few sols for it to clear." Drum roll please!
Let's not count Elon out just yet. The guy's got a genius knack for pulling off the impossible. Who else would send a mannequin dressed as an astronaut, driving a Tesla car, into space just for giggles? Maybe he'll come up with some Martian super-coin that runs on solar power and anti-gravity or whatever. Who knows? MBTC or METH... Okay not METH...
And while we are speaking of Elon...let's talk about his choice of cryptocurrency offering for Mars. Knowing him, he'll probably want something flashy, superior and futuristic. Forget about boring old fiat money - we're talking about maga space crypto bucks baby! I can picture Elon strutting around his Martian colony, tossing MartianCoin (TM Elon), like confetti and LSD at a space rave. Now that's a sight I'd definitely pay crypto to see.
But hold your space horses and helmets once again, because Elon might just throw us a weeny curveball. Knowing his fondness for all things meme-worthy, he might just decide to make Dogecoin the official currency of Mars. I mean, can you imagine? "In Doge We Trust" etched on Martian coins, with Elon's face plastered on every bill. It's enough to make a space nerd's heart skip a beat.
So how will cryptocurrency work on the planet Mars? Honestly, who knows? We're venturing into uncharted territory here, folks. But if there's one thing I've learned from watching too many sci-fi movies, it's this... In space, anything is possible... We have all seen that documentary 'Star Wars'.
And finally because unlike the universe we have to find an end... as Captain Kirk once famously said in some Star Trek movie or another, "Money isn't everything. So let's boldly go where no cryptocurrency has gone before, and may the force be with us..." or something like that.
Your thoughts?