WHY I LOVE MYSELF THE MOST?

in poem •  7 years ago 


pixaby

12 a.m., I saw th clock showing
But I had just slept at 10
Why get up so early?I asked myself
Because I won't let you sleep
The pain in my head replied

But I had given you what you demanded
I have taken so many tablets each time you asked for
I promise I had
I promise I am not lying
Even though the prescription said
"Take with food",
I took it early in the morning in empty stomach
Even when I was full of fear reading the caution
Using too much might damage your liver and kidney
I still took it too much
Because I wanted to satisfy you
I didn't want you to come

I took one in morning,
Then again after two hours
Then again
Then again
And again
But still it is paining
I feel I am not gonna live anymore
I typed a message saying, "I don't think I will be able to see you"
"I don't think I can bear the pain"
And then I deleted it!!
Because I knew it was 12 a.m.
And it would be annoying
And no one is gonna care
Even if I die
I was drenched in sweat
The blood vessels in my head trying to explode
Each part of my head paining like hell
I felt like my head was going to get paralysed
Being unable to bear the pain
I don't know how the watch stopped working
It didn't move at all
The pain seemed to be there for ages
And the watch said only 5 minutes passed

I wish someone would hold my hand
Tell me everything wouldbe fine
You will be alright
And lend me the shoulder to lean on
Where perhaps I could sleep
Even it's for a bit second
Without the painkillers
Without the tablets

It was too much to bear
"If it is only the shoulder to need to rest"
"I'll lend you one"
I told myself,
And stretched my hand
Rested my head
The pain seemed to be relieved a bit
The tablets seemed to work
Tears rolled down continuously
The pillow wet,
The bedsheet wet!

All of a sudden
The sun was shining
May be it was morning
I got up
The pain again seemed to take over me
I said,"I have to go the college and smile all day",
So you are not welcome
I took another tablet
To keep me smiling
"I love you"
"I will lend you my shoulder"
"And words of inspiration"
"And I am with you"
"When no one is around"
" I love you the most"
" I love you more than anyone",
I told myself,
Smiled and went away for my chores!!

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