Last month I wrote a post called, "Letter to the promise of the ring". I was inspired to write it about a coworker.

Anyways, little did I realize my beautiful cohost @hope777 would select it for our Sunday show. Romance on Air airs every Sunday at 7:00 pm UTC.

Shameless plug, listen to our show - listen to our show - listen to our show!

Well, she recently asked me to read the poem on air again. We were discussing marriage, vows, and rings when she asked me to read this poem again. It's odd reading my work out loud. It's a different experience, and I wonder what it sounds like when other people read it. Anyways, I wanted to explain the poem.

The poem and my thought process behind it.

To the married man,

I start the poem off like a letter because I wanted it to be a letter to all men.

You’ve done quite well. I see your efforts. You look at your wife and see her. You look at the young executive and don’t. Despite the tight skirt, low cut shirt, and brilliant mind. You listen, more than allow your eyes to wander. I wonder if your eyes will lust after more. Exchanging speech, will this be your downfall? Convincing speech, she’s educated and your eyes stay focused. You’ve done quite well.

I've noticed that his eyes could easily wander when chatting with the girls, but they never do. He looks away, he holds his eye contact, and avoids situations that would compromise. I'm not that disciplined. I tell the girls all the time how sexy and muscular their legs look, how distracting their low cut shirt is and that I am struggling to look away, so I’m not sure how the guys are doing it. Obviously, the guy’s saying this would lead to an H.R. violation. I am truly impressed with his effort.

I see your efforts. I see respect. I find you proud.

I see his efforts and I am so proud. I once read a book called, "*The Meaning of Marriage." One of the topics they covered was respect versus love when communicating. Men value respect as much as women value love. To a man, being respected is being loved. Whereas for women, to show respect isn't the same as being loved. Anyways, I think this coworker feels respected by his wife because he honors her with his actions at work.

Dear married man, Your eyes do not wander for lust. Steadfast, even your speech doesn’t flirt. I see you winning. Laughing, joking, at no point would your eyes put you to shame. She calls you Husband with pride. You’ve earned your right to stand tall. In the office, your name is clear. At their expense or your own, the jokes are clean and fun for all. You’ve done quite well. I see your respect.

In my eyes, his winning at life because he found the love of his life. Not only has he found her, but he respects her with his actions. He is an asset at work and in his household. In a sales position, conversations can get inappropriate quickly. Nonetheless, his integrity to the vows he made to his wife is never in question.

Dear married man, Gaining respect with each step. You walk a straight line with eyes only for your one and only. Avoiding the fire, eliminating the game, strengthening the gold ring promise. Proving once again, that eyes can train to neither look nor touch. You’ve done quite well. I see your efforts. I see your respect. I find you proud.

To anyone that says it’s okay to look, I disagree with that statement. It all starts in the mind; as I've mentioned before, we cannot control how we feel. We can, however, control how we think and act. Deciding to be faithful, choosing to control your want to look, are in my opinion fundamental to keeping the promises made at the altar. Many people don't agree with marriage, but those that do wear the ring as a reminder. A reminder of the lifelong commitment is a daily choice.

What do you think about marriage? What do you think about a wedding ring? Do you think it means anything? Does it mean anything to you?