MY FIRST ATTEMPT AT POETRY (LIMITLESS)........

in poetry •  7 years ago 

This was inspired by my untalented contest writeup by @surpassinggoogle. Kindly patiently read through. This is my first poem, so I am open to corrections.

LIMITLESS

Here stood a bird with a broken wing
Not caged but yet couldn't leap
Could it be its weakness trying to take a swing
Or yet its imaginations hindering a sweep?

All I wanted was to fly
No external factor, at least none i know of
Internally I am a self sly
Or could i truly be a rip off?
images(11).jpg
Picture source

The bird wouldn't be swayed
It flapped the unbroken wing and fell
I am not going to get played
So I rose and who can tell?

Morning to dusk I tried
Evening to dawn I believed
Feeling so torn and dried
I at last achieved!
images(12).jpg
Picture source

Pls how is my first attempt at poetry?? Dear poets in the house, kindly come and point out my errors. Thanks.

You can read my entry to the UNTALENTED contest here

https://steemit.com/untalented/@aderonkemi/untalented-the-truth-behind-who-i-am-by-surpassinggoogle

Dont forget to upvote and follow.... Much love ....

poetry nigeria genesisproject airhawk-project blog
7 years ago by

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    • [-]
      ·  7 years ago 

    You did well
    The ryhmes were top notch

    You can check my blog if you dont mind
    I also write poetry

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    2 votes
    [-]
      ·  7 years ago 

    I ain't a poet either, but what I look out for in poems is the rhyme which I feel this has... I guess the journey has started then. All thanks to this inspiring mind.

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    2 votes
    [-]
      ·  7 years ago 

    Hmm, then i guess you need to learn more about poetry.

    Blank verse and others

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        ·  7 years ago 

      @royrodgers has voted on behalf of @minnowpond. If you would like to recieve upvotes from minnowponds team on all your posts, simply FOLLOW @minnowpond.

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          ·  7 years ago 

        Thanks for your work as well! Followed @aderonkemi

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            ·  7 years ago 

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            [-]
              ·  7 years ago 

            Wow! This is beautiful for a first poem! Finally a worthy post. Original too.. Loved the picture of the bird too. You be correct lady.

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                ·  7 years ago 

              Thank you muchy

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                [-]
                  ·  7 years ago 

                This is real original work

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                  [-]
                    ·  7 years ago 

                  Real recognizes real. Don't stop being real... Thanks

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                    [-]
                      ·  7 years ago 

                    Your wings may snap. But don't breakdown. Pick up your pieces and sojourn on. Who knows if a wing of gold is ahead.

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                      [-]
                        ·  7 years ago 

                      Hmmmm... Thanks for your words of encouragement...

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                        [-]
                          ·  7 years ago 

                        The first step is always the hardest one. You can only get better. Nice try.

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