Toxic. (Part 3.)

in poetry •  7 years ago 

poison-bottle-medicine-old-159296.jpeg

I pretended I didn't notice
I pretended I didn't care.
Oh, but I did, didn't I?
I acted like I was perfectly fine,
That WE were perfectly fine,
When your mind,
When your body,
When your heart,
just wasn't there.

I lived for all those moments when you were slightly more affectionate
Those moments when i felt like you finally cared
Because let's face it,
Those were always rare.
I didn't realize,
Maybe because i was so scared to,
I never put it together that those moments were when we were in the eye of the storm,
With the world raging around us
With our problems and our issues beating on each other,
Never touching us like they usually did.
Those moments of possessiveness that you sometimes showed me
Played a role in fuelling that idea that I was important to you
And that you, in one way or another,
Wanted me back.

i wasn't the one,
i wasted your time,
i'm sorry,
i fell in love with someone who wasn't you.
your head was left on earth,
my head was out in space,
you waited every night,
for me to come home.
but, i was somewhere else,
drinking my sorrows away
while finding for someone else to love.

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