SteemitPoetryContest #11-Loneliness "Wash Away My Love" (Original Poetry by @dagger212)

in poetry •  7 years ago  (edited)

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Wash Away My Love

Far beyond the endless sea, across the windswept moors
Lies one who meant the world to me now silent evermore
Two sets of footprints walked the sands upon those distant shores
Now there's but one as waves roll in and wash away my love.

From the cliffs above the sea we'd contemplate the sails
Walking through the golden fields we'd search for hidden dales
Under tree and over hill we'd each blaze our own trails
Now there's but one as rains fall down and wash away my love.

Late at night the stars above would dance across the skies
And you and I would softly sing the sweetest lullabyes
Letting echoes fade away our songs would turn to sighs
Now there's but one as tears drip down and wash away my love.

Thank you again to @terrycraft for putting on this contest.

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@dagger212, this is a great poem. I love the rhyme scheme even though it threw me off at first. You put the reader in your tragic love story, and it left me feeling sorry at the end of each stanza. It's sometimes difficult for poets to elicit such profound emotions from short pieces such as this, but you did a great job of that here. Nice write.

Yes, I think as with most poems, they really need to be read through at least a couple of times just to get the rhythm the poet is using. Hopefully, some images pop out at you on those initial reads and then, once you have it down, you can go through it and (for lack of a better word) savor the essence of the poem without getting stuck on structure. For the most part I do okay on structure, but there are times I need to add an extra syllable, which works, but can cause some pause until the reader figures out where the accents are.

Thanks for reading and replying.

I miss your beautiful poetry!! I have read this so many times now, it flows so well, the words seems to whisper to you as you read it. It opens so well, like a true classic, it plants a seed in your mind and you can't help but return to. If you ever did a short book of collected poems, I would buy a copy, so please let me know :)

Hope to see more from you soon :)