Teenage girl working at a gym counter

Two hours later on the public family bathroom toilet
wiping my crotch with coarse paper before I wash my hands
I shake my head at how wide I opened my mouth in smile,
how large my eyes went excited when he said, "hello ladies."

So stupid, so dumb, so juvenile!
How could his tight tie and crisp button down
ever warm my back with his vein ribbed hands?
How could he ever run his five o'clock shadow down my thighs?

I was the one handing towels to him looking down over my blush
at his tapered waist; the belt buckle not bulging from a belly,
but sagging in to his abs like it wanted to push down his pants too.

I don't always look at the pee and toilet paper swirling
down the drain, but some days I do;
just to make sure I wasn't acting like an idiot whenever he came in.