St-ring (Day 24 of 100 -- Poetry challenge)

in poetry •  7 years ago 

string1.JPG

a string to connect
to bind
you to me

here to there
now to then
in to out

climb mount for-Ever
rock to rock
tied and true

come now
be on the line
your end to mine

hang in trust
you can hold
I won’t let go

a string-ring
a strong string
to hold this thing

until it rots

string.JPG

  • All pieces are newly crafted and posted shortly after in adherence to the rules of the challenge. All the photos are mine unless otherwise stated.

  • Entry for Day 24 of 100 Days of Poetry Challenge by @d-pend.

  • Join the Steemit School here: https://discord.gg/yZvYjfM organized by @dobartim on Discord.

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First, while I liked the title "Trans-Sending" a few days ago, I love this title. String, saint ring, and focusing on both the string that binds, and the ring that is the symbol of the bond itself. Nice.

Also, while in the prior day's poem (salt-grave), the final line brought everything into an emotional focus, into immediacy, this poem does even more, soars even higher, with regards to its final line - the final line changes the entire tone of the poem. It makes you go and read the entire poem again, but now with an eye to different things. It changes this one poem into two, and they contradict and complement one another, and so a symphony is born. That's great. That is exactly what a final line can do that is so rarely actually done. I too am a fan of the powerful final stanza/line, so I love this.

Speaking of which, the penultimate stanza (ok, final stanza, but the final line follows):

a string-ring
a strong string
to hold this thing

For those reading along, finally we have rhymes (apart from the incidental "line/mine" in the 4th stanza), as such it draws you along the sing-song tune, it speeds you up to the end. Where you crash into the final line. Which is the point.

And not only that, the message is also contradictory, so the effect is amplified - "A string-ring," which is the promise of forever. "A strong string," and yet, then it rots. And nothing is held together any longer.

And I like how the sense of forever is explored. Not just a metaphoric mountain, but trust that holds us together, a call to trust the other, to lean on them, to lean on the trust. To lean on the totality of "Here to there, now to then, in to out."

But all things come to an end.
But will it rot?
Do all things come to an end?
Considering "trans-sending" and "strange," and "resplendence" and other pieces, I wonder. There is always the fear of the string-rot. Of an end to all things. But most of your poetry I feel speaks either of things that end, or of the call to the eternal that never does.

climb mount for-Ever
rock to rock
tied and true

How is it we are bound together. Because bound together we are ... no doubt about that:) Wonderful write, mamadini:)

'Because bound together we are'

That is some treu true. <3

This was a marvellous poem. I am sensing that the words play around the concept of ring (as in the representation it has towards promises of eternity) as well as the string and its strength to hold and bind two pieces (souls, perhaps) together. It's difficult to put to words to what I interpreted, but it was beautiful and heartfelt.

You are right on track with a thread of intent in this piece.

Thank you for spending the time to comment, I am so busy I feel guilty for just upvoting right now and not leaving comments and I know I am not alone... this is a treat to see. :)

I'd say don't feel guilty, you don't owe us anything. Of course, comments/interactoin make a better experience, but I am sure for some of us, even reading great poems is more than enough ;)

Wow I really like this one... love the style and the flow... and the sentiment too.

Tied together we are through space and time!

Let's be strong strings for one another.

With Love
Hart Floe Poet

Let us all come together. :)

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