TGIF (Original Spoken Word)

in poetry •  7 years ago  (edited)

https://soundcloud.com/user-186900529/tgif

image

https://soundcloud.com/user-186900529/tgif

Flagella flinging
stinging bare back
attacked with malice
for the sin of bold benevolence
pestilence afflicted upon sacred skin
beginning the precious process of redemption,
tremendous burden placed upon shoulders shrouded in crimson
carried across crowds calling for carnal consequence
as men of prominence and stature play witness to the rapture
of divinity
obscenities assaulting ears
as tears from women weeping
fall, seeping into the soil
like the royal blood flowing from the crown
the ground colored red from the ransom

the appalling sound of his breathless body
falling down upon death’s hill
dead still until
consciousness comes compelled by pain
of strained muscles whipped into contraction
an earthly reaction from a heavenly portal
as our mortal ways
dim the rays of the sun
and the Son crumbles
stumbling under our yoke
his broken will...
those whips still killing
the redemption still spilling in the sand
when the Cyrenian man
is forced to carry his share and ours
for the one whose scars would not heal,
but reveal the proof that

Life conquers death

his breath,
shallow near the top
as the congregation stops

The Cyrenian’s burden relieved
No longer to be heaved for him
Whose limbs are now seized
And squeezed into place…for securing
Hammers and nails ensuring
Arms to icon affixed
among the convicts he was raised
and praised, in jest
his chest, bare
but his arms, wide
the heavens cried
the spear, in his side.

The path to the throne
was shone
for those who would follow still
willing to spill
their share of the burden
For us...

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Image above is a derivative work from a low resolution image of Salvador Dali's Christ of St. John on the Cross. It is also considered fair use as the poem was inspired by the image and is a critical commentary on the scene it represents.
Thanks for reading. Please feel free to share your thoughts below.

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Stirring. Really moving... I'm sort of speechless.
So much here to admire, but these lines stand out and ring in my ears:

among the convicts he was raised
and praised, in jest
his chest, bare
but his arms, wide

Thanks @geke! I'm sorry for the late reply. I got caught up doing some other things.

With this poem, I was trying to say some things without saying them. I was trying to come at a poem about Christ from a different angle by not using the normal adoration type language. I also wanted to be mostly non-spiritual so as to not alienate readers who are sensitive to that aspect (because this poem is not about that). With these lines, I wanted to point out the metaphoric interpretation of his outstretched arms. Thanks again for your comment.

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The imagery and rhythm of this poem are majestic. Both these elements really capture the intensity of both you as an artist and the subject matter. Thanks for sharing @moeknows

Thanks @raj808. As a spoken-word poet, I find that comment to be very flattering. I always try to use timing and rhythm to emphasize the content of the poem and this is the first comment that I've received about these components. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I appreciate it.

Holy @#^$,...er...Moley! Are you kidding me?!?! This is spectacular!!! Wow, dude. This deserves a place in public somewhere where it can be read by all. Like below a lighted statue of Christ or something. Seriously, well done!! The rhymes from the end of the line to the beginning of the next....I'm in awe. To tackle that subject matter and then nail every word...nothing is out of place here. I don't know what else to say. Outstanding....

You do know it's Christmas though, right? This is kinda Easterish....lol

Thank you @dagger212. I really appreciate that comment. You are right in that it is more of an Easter poem and the title Is referencing that specific event, but I wanted to focus a little bit on the beginning that this season is all about. It is a glorious story, and I have always had a tendency to rush to the end. So I guess that's what I was doing. Thanks again for your comment.

Well done! Intelligent without any attempts to be clever. Deep rich imagery and understanding of the truth you are articulating. Nice!