This Bitter Soul #Prose

I need to cut ties
Say our fucking goodbyes
With this adamant negative energy
Develop some kind of allergy
To my lurking self hatred
I know I should be cleansed
Drenched with holy water
The burden might get a bit lighter
And allow my soul to breath.

Holy chapters fight verses
Inside my haunted mind
Darkness effortlessly cruises
In my safe spaces
Chaos erupt upstairs
And the urge to smack a few heads
Is out here being too loud
I need to be found
Before I sink further too deep
Saved from feeling cheap
Can't you please see me dying?

I feel the shaking fingers
Unintentionally linger
When rage consumes my tired soul
Then proceed to count my fouls
More than I do the warm moments
That life unpredictably lents
These other braver souls for living
Though I only think about leaving
Speed to my inviting grave
To fight my light in the next life.

I know I am addicted
Even no longer conflicted
To how I feel about pain
Which is life without it is too plain
For an essence with such thick skin
Kindly leave what's within
That's a fire I fight on a daily
To keep it's furnace at a safe bay
Looking to give my happiness
A chance to find me.

           **Cross Posted**