Why Computer Programmers Can’t Pickup Women

Male and female attraction is a mysterious thing. Some guys are born knowing it; others spend their whole lives looking for it. Some guys are uglier than sin but always have a beautiful girl around; others are decent looking but haven’t been with a girl in years.

Figuring out attraction has become such a puzzle that nowadays you never have a shortage of countless blogs, various “gurus”, specific “methods” and a wealth of other information that aims to help the helpless in the right direction. But is the secret to attraction so complicated that it justifies a whole industry that has spawned around it?
Take a typical computer programmer as an example. He (as the overwhelming majority of computer programmers are male) is a smart, studious human being that spends the majority of his day making the computer perform magical calculations using his own magical code. While some programmers can pickup women, in my experience, the overwhelming number of programmers wouldn’t know how to pick one up if she had two handles on the side. It’s true that programmers aren’t the sexiest human beings in the world, but as I alluded in the points above, looks don’t tell the whole story.

Loosening Up
Last year, while I was living in Brazil, I went out with people from different backgrounds and nationalities all the time. Each one brought along their unique way of socializing with people, a way that was undoubtedly morphed by their own cultural pressures.

There was a serious German, a humorless Belgian, and a dry-witted Finn. Southern Europeans such as Italians and Spaniards were, in general, more relaxed. Latin Americans were even more care-free: from all the Argentinians I met, I don’t remember a single serious conversation I had with any of them. Yet, probably the most relaxed were the Brazilians. Perhaps it’s a direct consequence of living in a relaxed environment; with a beautiful tropical climate and pristine beaches, Rio’s residents live for today, and worry is for another day.

So, one shouldn’t be too surprised to discover that it was the Brazilians (and Argentinians) that were the most successful with women. While their approach and style were different, together they had many things in common.

The most important was that when they were out socializing they were never in a logical state, but always in an emotional state.

So what exactly does emotional state mean? It means flipping a switch in the brain and not bringing up anything leading to a heavy and prolonged logical discussion.

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