Dreams in bottles - what I actually want for myself? Continuation of my therapy series

Hi, guys!

I use my drawing dreams in bottles as an illustration for this post cause it really fits the subject I want to think about while writing it.

Well, for me it's not a question of finding a particular dream, I'm even not sure that at the moment I need one big instead of hundreds tiny steps. The subject of the post is my psychotherapy again.

As I said it before recently I changed a psychotherapist to psychiatrist and wow - finally it worked. Now, after 10 days of medication experience, I really understand that it finally began working. This feeling was pretty simple, and may be it will be really hard for me to explain what it means, but whatever... Yesterday I felt that I want something. Now it's not the point what exactly it was, but the fact itself was amazing. During my years of bipolar disorder I really forgot how it feels, I mostly had long depressive episodes, more then hypo-mania, so this feeling, feeling of wanting something was completely lost long ago.

Of course, I made some plans, fulfilled these plans, but nothing gave me either feeling of happiness, nor feeling that I really wished to do/have it. And yesterday when it came back I was really surprised, I thought that I've lost it forever. At the moment I'm so happy to know that it was a mistake!

One more thing I managed to fulfill in this 10 days period - I got back to workout. Nothing serious, just some gymnastics and yoga for health. Well, in fact I always dreamed to do some serious stuff in this direction, but my body has different opinion.  And even in sports that I was trying to master for years it was not much success. So, with serious workouts I agreed with my body and decided to avoid it. Only for health, and it's great that I have some strength to do it again.

One strange thing I experience at the moment - seems like I don't need any food any more:) I heard that anti-depressants can cause such effect, but never thought that something like this will happen to me. In total - I just have no appetite and even some disgust to food. So at the moment my ration is super simple, and perhaps it's OK too. I'll see how it'll go.

What I actually want at the moment? Perhaps to stay at this calm state and see, what will happen next. After all these years of failing I finally found something, that works, and damn, it's great:)

Hope you guys are also having a wonderful evening!:)

I wish you all the best and will be happy if you'll support me with vote:)

Love, Inber