On Writing, Fear, and Truth

"Creativity takes courage" - Henri Matisse

It is difficult to create. It takes, like Matisse says, courage, because it requires you to be open towards criticism or rejection of others. Yet, by bringing something forth into the world, it exists and it can therefore never not have existed at all. This means that any criticism is effectively mute, as it cannot undo the creative act. Any rejection is pointless, because rejection of any creation is merely disregarding the truth and therefore bound to be delusional.

For years, I have been afraid to create. I procrastinated and postponed, recoiled and retracted. I have convinced myself that I didn't really want to create. I convinced myself that I wasn't born to be creative. Yet we cannot escape the fact that we always create a life for ourselves. We always have to craft ourselves into human beings (preferably ones that we love). 

But fear is a liar. It convinces you of things that are not true, by painting a picture of a worst-case scenario, which lies somwhere in the future. Paradoxically, fear is therefore a creative act, albeit one that doesn't benefit the creator. One way to deal with this fear, is to acknowledge its presence, but not let it take control. Just say to yourself, whenever you notice it, "ah, there is fear", and continue to create. So instead of putting our creativity in creating fearful scenarios, we channel it into our work.

That is when truth comes in. We have to acknowledge what is there, being completely honest with ourselves (and honesty requires us not to believe the false stories we create through fear, but to admit that we are afraid to be judged or unloved or ignored). We then take this material and pour forth ourselves into the work, washing over this fear. Creating art in any form by breaking through fear barriers washes you clean, it clears your system of fears and brings joy all around. It makes you more truthful, and you can create with integrity.

And when this becomes apparent in your work, you are free. Your freedom will be infectuous and your readers (or viewers, or listeners) will be struck by your presence. Only those not in touch with their own creative powers, who limit themselves by their own fear, will dare to judge and criticize. 

Go forth! Create!