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Sugar-Coating Things- Why It's a Bad Communication Tactic Freewrite
As a former people-pleaser and someone who would constantly "sugar coat" hard truths, I have learned to roll this practice back. Being concerned with other's feelings should not cause us to water down our conversation.
When we have hard truths to share, especially with those we love or hold in high esteem, we can often feel the need to "sugar coat" things. When we sugar-coat the truth, it can become a lie and we lose our integrity. The road to Hell is paved in good intentions, and this is one of those times. We need to be courageous and overcome our prejudement of the listener and take the leap. The right thing isn't commonly the easy thing.
We can use several tactics to overcome our propensity to sugar-coat the truth. Taking the steps to explain and show that we don't mean to harm others with our words, and softening the blow after a dose of reality are key. We should be intentional and set the stage in a neutral location where the setting is comfortable and the message is not lost.
There is a subtle difference between being crass and direct. Often times, cultural influences make us avoid being offensive, but we may overcompensate by avoiding hard conversations. What is the right amount of "sugar" to use when we converse? That depends on our listener and the details of the situation we find ourselves in. Even if the listener is an anxious person in our eyes, we should not prejudge their reaction and censer ourselves.
As a takeaway, I have found it helpful to rehearse difficult conversations and listen to what the receiver has to say. Sugar-coating our difficult conversations can ultimately fail to convey the full gravity of our situation. Being honest is a risk, but most listeners will respect your honesty and your precise communication.
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