It's Not All About YOU!

in reason •  2 months ago  (edited)

"Brothers, I need advice

"Is there an equivalent of dropping the handkerchief today as an indication of interest? I talked to boomers about approaching and they said that women used to drop thousands of hints on them until they got it. They didn’t need to learn game, the small talk, how to be charming.

"Best I got throughout these years was a few looks my way. I never knew if that was enough of an indication so I never went for it. So I’m wondering what happened to all that? Why should men do all the work of body language reading, taking the risk, learning how to flirt, being the salesman, and selling the product?

"I feel like a bitch for not taking the initiative, being a leader, and approaching despite the fear or uncertainty."

"Stef, If you go on X i'd happily subscribe there too. (or double my donation)
"Is the possible financial incentive that is there not enough?
"People might mostly be looking for entertainment, but ideas are still planted, lives still changed.
"As a philosopher, don't you just go where the people are?
"The live spaces are just another platform"

"How should a young person approach their first romantic relationship? Would it be ideal to search for someone with the goal to build a family in the near future?

"If a young man wants to spend his youth building a business till he's 35yo, what will his romantic life look like? When he's 20, a good 20yo woman will not want to wait for 15 years to start a family with him. Then who can he be in a relationship with?"

"Dear Stef, I feel a little uncomfortable maybe even a little effeminate for lack of a better word, when I say hello to a woman at a bar or a nightclub?
"What is the best way to greet a woman i am trying to ask out on a date? Is it ‘Hello’, ‘G’day’ as is sometimes used here in Australia, I generally like to use this as it sounds the most masculine, ‘How you going?’, ‘How’s your night?’ . Whilst these slight variations may seem insignificant you do know Stef that women are particularly picky about man’s choice of words in the wooing process. For example, I recently greeted a young woman at the nightclub by saying ‘Are you Anya Taylor-Joy?’. This woman responded with a face that wasn’t enthusiastic to me, it was a look of disinterest and even more than that, it’s like her face was saying ‘every second you continue to talk to me is causing me immense discomfort, even pain?’ I quickly noticed she wasn’t making direct eye contact, she was looking down. I showed her a photo of Anya Taylor-Joy on my phone and she didn’t say anything and because she looked so uncomfortable I just left quickly when I noticed how pissed of her facial expression was. This woman was doing seductive dance moves in the nightclub at the top of the nightclub next to me & downstairs too so I thought because of proximity interest signalling that she might be trying to get my attention. Anyhow Stef do you think that it was a good pick up line to compare a woman to a famous actress, especially a young & very beautiful actress? It seems more unique and more of a conversation starter than a generic ‘Hello’. I don’t believe this woman was Anya Taylor-Joy because I live in Australia and I believe Anya-Taylor Joy has a boyfriend so I don’t think she would randomly be in a nightclub in Australia. This woman looked very youthful but there was slight aging under this woman’s eyes so I believe this woman must have been in her mid 20’s to late 20’s just like Anya-Taylor Joy. I have not seen aging under the actress Anya Taylor-Joy’s eyes but maybe it’s because she gets all make-up on her in movies. This woman was probably the height of Anya Taylor-Joy too & skinny, she had an identical body like Anya Taylor-Joy and this woman was about my height & I’m almost 6 foot like you Stef, so it may have been Anya-Taylor Joy but I think probably not, she looked strikingly similiar to Anya Taylor-Joy but not identical, I think. Just to show you a photo of Anya Taylor-Joy from the movie ‘The Northman’ you know the famous photo where she is glaring at the horizon with those famous big eyes, so you know what woman I’m talking about Stef. Stef I’ve heard it’s not a good idea to compare a woman to another woman, but surely being compared to a famous actress especially Anya Taylor-Joy is an acceptable gesture maybe even a compliment to a woman, would you agree Stef? Have you ever complimented a woman you were trying to woo by complimenting her by saying she looks like a beautiful famous actress or celebrity?"

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