LOVING CAN BE A SCAM

in relationship •  6 years ago 

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I get lost in oblivion most times, wondering what exactly it is women really want. They have been richly blessed and endowed in ways that is appealing and sometimes intimidating to men. Unfortunately, there are times they leave us with heavily thumping heart, wide eyes, mouth agape and brain busy trying to figure out different things pertaining to so many aspects of their lives, like their mood or when it swings, what exactly it is they want, what it is we have done something wrong, what they feel and a whole lot more. I can categorically say, ‘understanding women is not entirely impossible but it would have to be taken up as a course in school’. Sometimes I feel women don’t even understand themselves.

I have not been on the good side of relationships; I guess that is what inspired this article. I felt the need to share my encounter with you and to get your views on how some relationships are not worth it, or maybe the woman is the one not worth the worth. By virtue of being in a relationship, one should be accustomed to love, trust, growth, romance, peace, satisfaction and most important of all, Happiness. There are many more bliss and blush that comes with a relationship, but when one is not getting any of that out of a relationship, what can be done?

On a cool evening after my football training, I met a beautiful lady. I was initially intrigued by her interest in watching the football training and when I talked to her, I was even more intrigued by her love for sports because only a very few women enjoy sports. We exchanged contacts, and in a few weeks, we were close friends already. As the days went by, I knew I wanted to be more than just friends with this girl. I told her about my growing feelings but she was against the idea of a relationship and strictly wanted to be just friends. I could not give up easily, I went with the flow hoping that she would change her mind eventually. We got even closer that any outside person would think we were dating, still, she would keep insisting and playing it like a reminder in my ears that we were just friends. I could not take it anymore, I had to stop going way beyond bounds for someone who refused to reciprocate my throbbing feelings. I reduced the calls, the time, the care and many other sacrifices I had been making. I started hanging out with my other female friends which I had stopped because she felt jealous about it. Soon enough, she started doing the calling, the caring, just to win back my affection but I was long gone by then.

I could not remain an unrequited lover, a victim to women’s heart confusions. It was not even a relationship yet, it was depriving me of so much, friends, happiness, creativity. It could be that her purpose in my life is to teach me not to succumb to any relationship or friendship that is not bringing out the best in me. After I made the decision to stop the excessive care, I then realized I was backward in a lot of things. I left set goals pending, and stalled my priorities just because she became my goal and priority. Not everyone is the same, you might be lucky enough to find someone who brings the best in you. Just don’t be blinded so much by love that you can’t tell when you are depreciating or elevating. Loving can be a scam if you let it be, not necessarily by the other partner but by you.

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