Yes, you read it right. I've been working in my company for almost 4 years. Work and life balance was bit easy when I started but as times goes on, it became heavy on my shoulders.
The work started to be confusing and degrading, the people you get along were long gone, they have resigned and yet, I am here staying for long hours per day still contemplating whether to quit soon or not. My father lost his job 2 years ago due to his ego, he went into fight, and with him throwing his punch he threw with it the financial support that his big family was relying into, my mother don't have a decent one, and they made 9 children on their own. As the eldest daughter, I am carrying the what they called responsibility. It is in our culture to look back and help our family members.
I am for the last 2 years, the only one who have what they called decent job. Working in an airport is quite a music to the ear but a so so stressing to my veins, standing for 12 hours straight, salary of only 15K per month,feeding hungry mouths, I couldn't even think of any formula of math which can solve the problem.
I am supporting two siblings to university, one taking Bachelor in Education and the other one Bachelor in Electrical Engineering. They are the third and fourth in my family,they are good children that's why i supported them. The second one next to me find himself working in a fast food chain, which we are always fighting for because like me, he finished university, i always offered him another decent job but he always refused, hard headed bastard just like his paternal aunties who doesn't have any dream than working in a fast food chain or standing long hours in a department store. I mean, i don't have anything against people working from those industries, it's just disturbing to think that they wasted at least 4 years in university paying for almost 1 million peso just to work in a fast food chain and earn 300 peso a day! Where they could have worked in at least a 5 star hotel because they have all the qualifications the establishment requires, or in the airport or government offices which they can get at least 20K a month plus allowances and all the benefits. But they choose to fail. I agree on those philosophers or billionaires that before they became who they are now, they been working as waiters on some cheap fast food, but it doesn't mean you have to work the same! Well, unless they are the owner of those famous fast food chain, i don't have a problem.
Now, back to me. I am 24 years old, probably still young and naive. But I also balanced my life, trying to make money and feeding those hungry mouths, while trying to live my life and love life.
Speaking of love life, I used to have one previously, i help him with his business here in my place because foreigner can't own a business here. Then, we found a place where we can stay, and he bought a car. I thought my life would somehow be better. Little did i know it was bitter. He doesn't want me to share my earnings on my family, I understand why but he should as well accept it why. Secondly, as times goes along, i felt choked on, I felt he is treating me like his ate (big sister /maid) the last description is. And until he used force violently, he became violent it was such a chaotic week that was.
So in short, the life that i thought i can finally breath was a nightmare.
A lot of things happened that time. For more or less 3 months, i would always think of ending my life.
Until one fine day, I heard the only clear and lovely voice from the crowd of my chaotic life. Alas! It's Mr. Pilot, he's back. I don't know what is his intention this time, but it just feel so right and warm.
Just so you know, he was courting me while I was stuck on my previous relationship. Knowing that i was almost going to tie the knot, he left. I thought that was right for me to say and right for him to do.
I once heard to his friend that once he says no, it's no , if he says he will stop he will never come back. I heard it clearly.
But, for this once strike of lightning, in the middle of the dead sea of my life, he messaged me asking how I was with my life. Ofcourse, the opportunistic me, I never wasted any time but still considering that he will just left me like the rest of them, I made time for him.
He was stationed in Thailand for couple of years, I only knew him when he commented on one of my picture in our mutual friend in facebook. And after the chaotic experience i had, he came in to the rescue. He offered me to visit him for couple of weeks, i was hesitant and i didn't full trust him, he was still a stranger to me that time. But I went their considering that I will commit suicide here anyway.
I reached Thailand and for the first time i saw him. There was a little excitement but i never felt butterflies on my tummy or this kind of stuffs, everything just feel so natural, and as comfortable as fluffy pillows as if, he was the missing puzzle in my chaotic life. I stayed there for 10 days, and for those days, he given me the time, the patience and even material things. Ofcourse my dear girl friends, i never forget about the thought that he may be just wanted to fuck me. But to my life's surprise, 10 days was finished, he treat me this lavish lifestyle, luxurious vacation but yet he never touched me!
I started to contemplate whether there is something wrong with his junior or he realized that i'm not really that sexy or he just respect me to the moon and back. Well ofcourse, it's thati don't want to , more so i wanted to know more or him and how can i thank him for everything he have done. Those 10 days he treated me personaly and even on our previous communication, i could have lived for more than years from my ex.
Months passed by, he never changed, but ofcourse my dear girl friends, sex was deliciously awesome!
Then i asked what he wanted from me and why he is falling inlove with me.
.....(my boss is coming back to office......to be continue)...