"Check your privilege, cognitivist scum!" - The SJW battle-cry of the 21st century
Cognitive Privilege & Peak Social Justice Stupidity
It was another day in the mind-numbing trenches of the Social Justice Wars of the early 21st century when my PC Sergeant started screaming, "Take cover purple penguins! Politically incorrect satire incoming!"
Embrace & reject your privilege, we're all victims & oppressors now!
I knew the day would come. The day the category of privilege would be identified that conclusively proves that everyone is a victim of someone else's privilege. That day was July 25th, 2017. What a glorious day!
Finally, we can all acknowledge that we are all oppressed by a privilege everyone has. It was just what I needed to legitimize my feelings of chronic oppression! It explains everything. And what is the category of privilege that oppresses us all? Here it is:
Intelligence.
That's right, intelligence! Unfortunately, the privilege of identifying this privilege category was appropriated by a privileged white guy named Dan, who had to demonstrate his intelligence privilege by terming it 'cognitive privilege' instead of 'intelligence privilege'.
Having identified cognitive privilege, he then turns around and rubs it in our faces by using big words! Can you believe it? How dare he!? I am suitably outraged. But we can give him a pass, after all, it isn't every day we get a new privilege category that can be specifically quantified for each and every individual on the planet.
Mandatory I.Q. "Cognitive Privilege" Tattoos for Social Justice
Now we can mandate IQ tests for everyone in order to establish the cognitive privilege hierarchy. We can get forcibly tattoo everyone's IQ on their forehead so their relative privilege will be visible to everyone, it's a new and improved scarlet number! It will be the great equalizer!
Now anytime someone more cognitively privileged than I am tries to correct me or tell me what to do, I can scream "Check your privilege, you cognitive scum!" And I can feel shame when I see someone with an IQ lower than my own. The perfect mechanism for achieving social justice has been found, fully self-reinforcing and unavoidable. Glorious!
The Great Cognitive Privilege Tyrant has been found!
Fortunately, by identifying cognitive privilege as the scourge it is, Dan also did us all a favor by helping us identify the greatest oppressor of all, the one man in the world who oppresses all of us with his cognitive privilege. Who is he? His name is Terence Chi-Shen Tao. With an IQ of 230, Terence has the highest measured IQ of anybody alive.
That privileged cognitivist tyrant! How dare he? That is so politically incorrect, doesn't he understand how hurtful that is to the rest of us? How is it that one guy, just because he was born cognitively privileged, can have the right to make the rest of us feel stupid in comparison? Doesn't he know his mere existence hurts all of our feelings with his irrefutable displays of cognitive privilege!? Especially those of us who aren't that great at math? Damn it! Check your cognitive privilege, Terence!
Championing the Greatest Victim
Unfortunately, this has also raised the greatest conundrum of the modern social justice movement. We don't know who we are to champion as the greatest victim of us all. That is an injustice that cannot be tolerated! We need to find the person with the lowest IQ on the face of the planet and give him/her/(f)aer/em/per/them/ver/xem/hir a prize for being the most cognitively oppressed! We need to raise him/her/(f)aer/em/per/them/ver/xem/hir up and out of his/her/(f)aer(eir/pers/their/vis/xyr/hir underprivileged state!
We need... oh wait... as Dan pointed out: "We now know that intelligence is not something we have significant control over but is something we are born with." Shit. That means we might not be able to stop cognitive privilege from oppressing him/her/(f)aer/em/per/them/ver/xem/hir. What are we to do?
The Perfect Social Justice Solution to Cognitive Privilege
Fortunately, I have a solution. We just have to create an even playing field, and I know just how to do it. Hold on to your seats, you might not like it, but when you think it through logically, it is the only way for us to stop our cognitive privilege from disadvantaging everyone less intelligent than ourselves. It is also the best way to stop the more cognitively privileged from oppressing the rest of us.
Are you ready? Here it is: lobotomies for everyone! Paid for by the someone else, of course.
We'll start with Terence, who I am sure will understand, then we'll hit the top ten. Hmm...based on that list, it looks like we may have to exhume a few people, but after that, it should be clear sailing. The last brave low-IQ doctor, who will have been volunteered to support this most just of social justice solutions, will just have to just jab himself in the eye and swirl the stick before he loses consciousness. The new utopia is upon us!
Now, who's with me?
p.s. I thank Terence Tao for being a good sport for his inclusion in this bit of satire, we need more people like Terence, not fewer. Respect! I can only hope he doesn't find himself targeted by real social justice warriors for his "cognitive privilege".
p.p.s. For non-satirical commentary on "cognitive privilege" see Daisy Luther's excellent write up "Smart People Need to Check Their Cognitive Privilege.". Also enjoy the comments on ZeroHedge, here.
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Shot with a golden arrow,
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Don't forget to upvote, follow and resteem! Comments always appreciated.
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All gifs courtesy of Giphy
Source of Terence Tao image
As long was we get to use other people's money for that lobotomy. That's how it works right?..other people are rich so I'm entitled to their money.
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Of course, you wouldn't expect a SJW to pay for their lobotomy would you? That's what the government is there for!
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This post received a 4.2% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @cupidzero! For more information, click here!
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good post
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This was just awesome lol, thank you.
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Glad you liked it, thanks for the feedback! I have been treating the SJ movement in my last posts in a more serious tone and I thought it was time for a life. Check my blog, you might like what you find!
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This is funny. Thanks a great read.
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I had to laugh while writing it too, was a nice change from my more serious treatments of SJ, check my feed, you might like what you see!
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I am following and did check out your feed. Thanks.
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Dan's original article had to have been a satire too. If it wasn't, I'd like to argue his premise that higher intelligence is going to mean higher paying job without considering other factors (Economy, demand, competition, what society values, nepotism/cronyism, mental stability/health, assertiveness and drive of the candidate...) Cognitively privileged oppressor that I am, lol.
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At first I thought it had to be satire too, and maybe it is, just formulated in a way that I am too relatively cognitively oppressed to recognize. I included the link to the original in my post above, and it doesn't appear to be satire to me, check it and tell me if I am wrong. Thanks for the reply!
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This post has received a 5.00 % upvote from @buildawhale thanks to: @buildawhale.
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Cool, thanks buildawhale (or whoever sent you swimming my way)!
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:)
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Great post cupidzero. This one was much less disturbing then the reality of your last SJW article. I won't have nightmares...
This really lays out just how ignorant this movements principals are if you take them to their logical end. Thank you again for making me think about something I have not had to think too much about until you came along. Sincerely!
upvoted. resteemed.
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Yes, even my hardened sensibilities I need a break from the dystopian nature of reality sometimes, and a little light-hearted satire provides a break in the clouds. The use of little foresight combined with logic can be funny as well as nightmarish. Thanks for your vote and resteem!
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Next one is up Frankenstein's Monster - serious this time.
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Well shot @cupidzero. I think I read a post on similar lines a couple of days on Steemit. You've put it out really well. Makes a lot of things clearly for me although some concepts are really vague. I'm from South East Asia, so political correctness is not much of an issue here. But thanks to the highly influential Western media, it is catching up. Might as well start learning the him/her/(f)aer/em/per/them/ver/xem/hir pronouns.
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Yes, the global reach of American MSM and social media is unfortunately spreading this belief system around the world. If you want to see what else it is causing from a more serious and critical perspective, check my other recent blog posts, particularly Social Justice is Its Own Worst Enemy, which will help explain why the concepts are so vague. You can also read my two part treatment of [safe spaces] which are a manifestation of this wayward ideology.
In regards to the pronouns, to date when I have been asked to appropriately gender my language usage, I have responded with something along the lines of "Telling me how to speak is a sign of your privilege, check it, please." Nothing better than using the terminology of the SJWs to stymie their anti-free speech views.
Thanks for taking the time to respond to my post! I appreciate it!
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Wow...thank you for actually taking the time to responding to my comment @cupidzero. I'll go through your other article because you have put into words what I have been thinking all along and could not express. English is not my first language so I am not a prolific writer but yes, I have been following this "privilege" issues and how its slowly encroaching our communities.
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I've been working on a piece about cultural appropriation, it might interest you: Horror on the Horizon - Cultural Misappropriation and The Politics of Oppression.
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Thank you. Will sure go through it.
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very funny nice post sir your vote is also important for me
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Glad you liked it!
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we either drive this trash out of the country, or we will fail as a socirty.
right now we are failing; we need to strike at the root of the problem, an entire subpopulation of brainwashed traitors
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Yes, the root of the problem is the entrenched tenured Marxist postmodernists in the liberal arts and sciences who have mastered the manipulation of young minds and been carrying out a sociopolitically subversive agenda since the early 80s (as far as I can tell). I don't want to throw fuel on the fire, but if you don't know it, you should: The 45 Goals of Communism as Read into the Congressional Record in 1963.
What has become clear too late is that the Frankfurter School of critical theory (funded by USSR interests) gave rise to postmodernism and found its US beachhead in the Yale school of new criticism and intellectually legitimized the radical relativism essential for the social viability of Marxism. Striking at the root of the problem is a matter of refuting and intellectually discrediting the postmodernism movement of radical relativism, namely that reality is what we _believe_it is and not something that can be objectively determined (because human objectivity is impossible) etc. etc.
Once the absurdity of "I believe it, therefore it is so," is intellectually demolished in higher secular education and publicly so, the spell on millions will slowly break. Unfortunately, the so-called intellectuals of the last 30 years in the liberal arts have built their careers on the postmodern belief system and actually believe it isn't belief, but fact. This has caused them to create an echo chamber at the universities, where any intellectual heavy weights who could challenge their faith just can't get a job.
Anyway, I see that I should be writing a post on the topic, which is on my list of things to do, but still a ways off. Thanks for reading and upvoting Stevescoins!
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Tell us how you really feel. But in all serious, you hit the nail on the head with that one. A big difference between Communism and Socialism, is Communists wanted to establish socialism quickly via violence and revolution, whereas Fabian Socialist preferred to do it slowly via propaganda and legislation. The word "socialism" is not emphasized, rather euphemisms such as welfare, medical care, higher wages...in other words "entitlements" without using bloodshed. They are using gradualism, and if you look at the Fabian symbol of movement, it's a turtle. They knew grown men couldn't be convinced, so they attack the minds of the young and impressionable.
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Yes. the Fabians are in it to the neck as well. They figured out it was really easy to manipulate people over time by abusing the anchoring heuristic, which is exactly why we see the rise of this behavior in our education system. I am currently working on a post that discusses this topic. The excellent graphic you posted "When I strike, I strike hard" says it all. We are seeing the culminating phase within the education system today. Stay tuned!
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Next one is up Frankenstein's Monster
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LOL, this is exactlyy what I was going to suggest as I read the comment
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Next one is up if you are interested: Horror on the Horizon - Cultural Misappropriation and The Politics of Oppression.
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I’m yet to come across a mentally stable social justice advocate. They cannot get into their thick skulls that being oppressed doesn’t imply one’s innocence. Given the chance, everybody oppresses and milks everybody else, and that’s how things are gonna go on unless we edit this evolutionary madness out of our genetic code.
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If we look at the studies on altruism within extended families, it is not the case that oppression and exploitation are the rule; indeed it is implied by the data that degrees of altruism are linked to genetic similarity Rushton. Of course, don't mention this to a SJW unless you want to be called a racist or ... I don't know, geneticist is already taken.. a genetic favoritist? "You love your family more than strangers? You familyist! :P This would suggest, if I understood your "edit" reference correctly, that maybe we don't want to edit out our competitive nature, but rather enhance our innate altruism to include the human genome in its entirety? You gave me something to think about, thanks for your response!
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Familyist, lol – learning new vocab every day!
By ‘evolutionary madness’ I was referring to the human animal being a slave to greed and fear, which are embedded in our genome and manifest in our daily lives. Purely biological existence is and always will be based on the food web. Transcending that crap would take a lot of editing on our genome instead of talking that, for example, whites oppressed blacks, when everybody knows that blacks would have done the same to whites if the pecking order had been reversed. We all are drowning in a big pile of shit the organic life is, and the fools are arguing over nuances of the stink instead of addressing the core issues present in the human condition itself.
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Wow! Great thoughts. I love the last sentence. Never thought of this before!
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Thanks for tuning in, @morseke1 :-)
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Next one is up if you are interested: Horror on the Horizon - Cultural Misappropriation and The Politics of Oppression.
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Next one is up Frankenstein's Monster - this one has a more serious tone however.
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Are you trying to make us feature every post of yours in @buildawhale’s Curation Digest? ;-) They’re really good!
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I take it you enjoyed this one then? I'm glad to hear it, I wish I could make every read as humorously entertaining as this one, but sometimes I feel compelled to treat things more seriously. Ummm, well, I did submit a few of my recent posts to buildawhale in the hopes they get some more attention... is it working? :D
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Don’t let all the praise go to your head, lol.
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Hello here nice photo
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This post has received a 100% upvote and a resteem from @melowd thanks to: @cupidzero! For more information, click here!
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Dear friends I will not like to, do this alone because I love to have fun with friends and family thats why I have decided to bring my upcoming birthday even here on steemit to have more people celebrate with me I have created a post https://steemit.com/my/@nwagod4/my-birthday-countdown to make sure you all join me to celebrate my birthday worldwide, your comments and upvote is one in a million to as you help to make my birthday a very happy one the count down continue till my birthday day. Just follow @nwagod4 and the https://steemit.com/my/@nwagod4/my-birthday-countdown to make your comments about the countdown.
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What does this have to do with the original post. No one is going to go to your link if you put this stuff into comments for quality posts.
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what do you mean?
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please speak for yourself don't generate issue here, every member here has right to follow or join what do you mean by no one is going to go to your link
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You chose a very excellent post to write a comment that has nothing to do with the post and to advertise to people to go to a link to celebrate your birthday! I think my comment is clear enough.
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Sorry dear you are not making any sense to me because I don't understand how my invitation to my celebration is affecting you, if you don't want to celebrate with me y not allow others and face your business here, everyone here has a goal and means to achieve it, so focus on yours OK. Don't interrupt others. This is a social network not a private business and everyone has the right to be noticed.
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If you care to hear what I'm saying, I'm quite sure others will simply ignore your commentary and see it as spam if it shows up as random comments not at all linked to the post. It takes away value from the post... If you want to think otherwise, it is your choice, but I think over time you will realize no one is actually joining in your side conversation.
By the way, happy birthday.
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Thanks for taking this guy to task, he clearly doesn't have a clue about what is appropriate and what isn't. I decided just to ignore him for the spam he is. His tattoo should be his rep number.
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LOL! When he lashed out about minding my business, that just crossed my line.
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thanx for join the group......this my stetergy that who follow me i follow them, and who up vatt me i also up vatt his post,and who
Comment at my post i also coment in thaire post..is'nt it cool....!
i up vatt u and coment in your post....
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Jesus Christ, this is getting dire. Next they'll be asking smart people to voluntarily stop contributing to discussions and decision making so that stupid people can "have a voice." As if the quality of most discourse these days doesn't reflect the Lowest Common Denominator already!
And it's funny how people are always quick to cry "elitist" when talking about intellectual or verbal ability, but they never object to the people of the highest ability being the ones who get to play on pro sports teams. After all, it's extremely elitist to pick NBA teams by who can play basketball the best in the world. They should make the NBA, the NHL, the MLB and the NFL national lotteries where the names of the players of each team are picked randomly from the U.S. population so that no one with "athletic ability privilege" is unfairly favored for the teams. We could have a great selection of elderly, middle aged, overweight and wheelchair-bound people playing for the NBA. That's the only way it will stop being an elitist organization.
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I had to laugh at the idea of professional sports having diversity quotas, good point!
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I just think it's inconsistent that we don't want the "best and the brightest" in some areas because of "elitism," but there are other areas where only the top .001 can participate. We're suspicious of intellectual pursuits and abilities.
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