It's my fault !

in satire •  7 years ago 

When you write a post about steemit performance issues make sure you :

  • Don't offend any big ass whale
  • Don't say it's steemit's crew 's fault
  • Don't say "They should be working on fixing the issues before releasing any new features"
  • Don't come up with conspiracy theories and blame it on others.

I won't put a photo in this post or use steemit tag, and hopefully, nobody will notice this text.

Or just blame it on me

On your next blog post,if you feel the urge to blame the performance issues on somebody,blame it on me.

Say

I had to click 3 times for the upvote button to work.
Fuck you @fishmon .
Your dog is chewing the internet cable again.
Fuck your dog.

Ok, don't say Fuck your dog, that's rude.

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So, you are to blame for the DDOS attack. It's good you have come forward, now we will sacrifice you to appease our whale demi-gods.

I am ready be be sacrificed for the good of the platform!

105 killograms of me!

Hei, can i chew your new phone cable?
can i?
please

If you chew one more cable, i swear to god..

You're grounded , mister!

...

I wont blame you.
I will blame my internet provider.
It is allways their fault anyways.

No, it's me! I take the responsibility !

So... you are the steemit-Jesus?

I will take all of the platform sins/spams upon myself for a better word!

Nice post dear

This is also because of me

yes friend is of you lol