Ho...ly crapper this was awesome.

So previously I used a little red laser I got for a dollar to look at some AMAZING stuff, from milk, to bottled water, my cat's drinking water and even the infected ooze coming out of my toe.

But the laser was weak and the lens flawed and so the results, although pretty amazing, could have been much better. So I invested an extra 1,000%, on a $10 purchase green laser for more power and clarity, and I was not disappointed.

it came in a box... a box!

FYI, Smash can somehow reach his entire leg around the Cone of Shame, so I had to extend it with bits of cardboard to stop him licking his wound

This laser is insane. It's the kind people get arrested for for shining it into airplane cockpits. It was a pain in the arse setting up my apparatus this time round because I couldn't physically look at the damn thing without burning my eyes.

So what did I look at this time? Well, as requested by @ruth-girl, I dunked the syringe into my toilet to see what was going on there. I made sure to... use it... beforehand to get extra results. To compare, I went with my own saliva which I did with the red laser but it was so crowded I couldn't really get a good image even when diluting with clean water. This time would be different.

So I strongly advise you watch these videos because the results were legitimately surprising on so many levels. First up: Toilet water.

Now, if you saw the previous video, you'll realize that actually this is somewhat disappointing! But it makes sense if you think about it. The water in the tank is regular water, drinkable in the west, and once you flush, the majority of that water is going to be unused. Now I could have taken some water after use and BEFORE flushing, but @trumpman's demands for me to get a sensory analysis going was somewhat overwhelming so I played it safe.

Next up: My saliva. I deliberately held off cleaning my teeth for the day in anticipation of this, to get maximum results, so I suppose thinking about it, it's unfair that I used flushed toilet water to compare. But either way. This was amazing.

Must must must watch!

Now, what I can tell you is that I expected a lot of 'strepto' prefixed bacteria often found in saliva; Streptococcus Salivarius, Streptococcus Sanguinis and so on. Strepto basically means 'long chain', and is indicative of bacteria that forms such snake-like trails. I actually didn't see much if any of that. _{(coccus means spherical bacteria)}

I do think I saw some Veillonella, though, which is a bulky bacterium known for fermenting lactate. You can see it float around like a monolith in the video.

The other ones that seem ubiquitous in everything I look at, well, I don't know but it must be either a super common bacteria or even not bacteria at all, some kind of mouthy debris, though that doesn't explain the spherical consistency. If anybody has a clue, let me know!

There are about 1,000 types you might find in your mouth alone, so without proper equipment it's probably impossible to tell unless some are particularly outstanding in appearance. And by the way, a clean, toothbrushing person will have about 100,000 bacteria on each tooth. If not, you might be looking at upwards of 1 billion on each tooth. That's what I was going for!

Most of the bacteria is actually beneficial, helping to fight with our immune system and so on, but too much of them can cause acidic decay, and not cleaning can generally allow more dangerous ones to flourish, ones that cause lyme disease and all sorts of crap.

So don't take this post as a reason to permanently remove all saliva from your mouth, because although it looks significantly more disgusting than even toilet water, they're actually a part of you, and you need them! Maybe say thanks when you next clean your teeth =D

Image Sources:

Veillonella