How To be The Most Extreme Version of Yourself

in self •  8 years ago 

Tone it down...

You might need to bring it down...

I am not sure if that is a good idea to do that much...

This is what most people will tell you your entire life...

It took one person for whom I was ghost-writing to say "stop being inhibited...i can tell you want to write 'fuck'...if you need to write 'fuck' to express yourself, don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't. At a certain point, you are stifling your own expression by catering to the needs of social convention. I understand that most people have told you that you need to tone it down, but now I am telling you, that you need to turn it up. I am not saying just use 'fuck' every other word, but stop holding back!"

This caught me off guard. I had NEVER had someone tell me to be MORE extreme. Be MORE expressive. Be MORE angry. Be MORE passionate. Be MORE uplifting. Whatever you were going to do, do it with 100X the energy you were going to do it with before.

I thought deeply about what it meant to be MORE of what I was trying to express...after a while I realized it was more like releasing a dam than exerting energy. If I feel passionate about something, good luck getting me to shut the fuck up about it. If I am upset about something, my voice will rise without me even knowing, and after a while I may in fact be yelling and I am not even trying to yell, but the subject has brought that out of "me".

Expression is strange, because you want to know how people are responding to your expression, but if you do that too much then it dramatically changes how you express yourself. If you care about the audience too much, you are not yourself...if you care about the audience too little, you may get into parts of yourself they don't care about.

At the end of the day, if you are expressing something, without an audience did the tree really fall and make a noise in the forest?

Schrodinger would say yes and no...

That's a different post tho...

If you are the tree, fall and make as loud a fucking noise as you possibly can when you hit the ground, and the impact crater will let motherfuckers know that there was in fact a goddamn sound...no immediate observer necessary...

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