At this point, I just need to purge the incessant chatter in my head because I fear that if I do not, madness and neurosis will become bedfellows in sealing my fate as that crazy lady down the street who talks to herself while pushing an empty baby stroller down the road and hurling insults at passerby's.

I can relate to so much of this. I kept copying parts to post in the comments as a quote... and realized that I was copying the entire thing. I have been in a similar place as you are and I know that you are strong as hell and you will carry on and be stronger than ever. I know that sounds trite, but it really isn't.

I'm here to listen/read, because I understand that part more than most... the healing from writing, working through our shit by getting it the fuck OUT of our heads. I get that.

I'm glad you're here.
@byn