I could sense the desire in the air for the next part of this series, so get your shitposting-cap on and let's dive right in!
The first rule of shitposting: forget grammar, spelling, punctuation, and capitalization - basically everything your teachers in school ever taught you about language -forget it
That's right, you're on Steemit now so toss all rules of language out because that shit is for people who read! We don't do a whole lot of that here on Steemit, but most robots don't read for pleasure anyhow.
Now, turn on autotype and ignore those red lines because we are rebels!!!
Don't let those red lines deter you from slapping that post button! Remember: those rules are made for readers and we ain't gots time fo dat. Who really has the time to format, punctuate, spellcheck, and proofread a post for the 9 readers on Steemit? I know so many of you do not, so let's move on before all nine of you hit your reading cap today...
In times of lull: post incessantly and with no regard!
If nobody is reading this shit, then, by all means, pump out a few dozen shitposts and by some votes. I said "by" instead because typing an extra letter is really a pain in the ass. You know what I meant, right? As you can see here, I am still in practice and do struggle from time to time while creating my own shitposts.
I'm Sofa King Prouda Yew
I am so proud of you for skimming all the way down here and would like to congratulate you half-heartedly for your completion of this part 3 lesson. Remember to not sweat over the details like spelling your title correctly or capitalizing the letter "i" when speaking in the first person, or even using there, they're, and their properly. Leave it to the readers to figure out what the hell you're talking about, as you, the author must punish them for giving you their precious time.
You can still earn massive upvotes for your total disregard of language, form, and delivery - just look at the trending page!
Don't forget to catch up on the previous lessons so that you may one day graduate from this course and become an infamous shitposting master of Steemit. And just remember to never format your shiposts or people might actually read it!
That's it for lesson 03 of the series and you can check out the Shitpost Series Intro if you missed it.
Thanks, as always, for reading and supporting my content. I hope you stay tuned for this series because it's been a lot of fun in the making. Until next time... ✌️😎
SHITPOST YOUR WAY TO SUCCESS 🥇SATIRE SERIES by @GROW-PRO:
• Introducing: SHITPOST YOUR WAY TO SUCCESS 🥇All NEW Steemit-Exclusive Mini-Series
• SHITPOST YOUR WAY TO SUCCESS 🥇NEW Steemit-Exclusive Series • Lesson No. 1 • Letting go of quality for profit
• SHITPOST YOUR WAY TO SUCCESS 🥇NEW Steemit-Exclusive Satire Series • Lesson No. 02 • Stealing Art 101
I gave Ua 13precent upgrote @enforcer48 @steemseph @anthonyadavisii should read thit shirt it is some gud stuf.
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Wow, a shit post, shitposting about shitposters posting shit posts.
Well Shit.
Welcome to opencomedymice. wait I don't think that's right. Oh who cares, am i write?
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😆🍻
Great way to put it, @idikuci
I propose a toast to the shitposts
May the Dreams, STEEMs, and Memes be with you
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You've got some great comedic talent,
You should put an entry in #comedyopenmic it's a great community that runs a weekly comedy contest to bring out the best talent in steem.
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That sounds awesome! I have to wear underwear for that, right?
Either way - that seems like something I'll enjoy! I may not be the best talent but I'm good at laughing 😆
Thanks @idikuci
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i usually just make my posts completely covered in vaseline only wearing cowboy boots. Everyone has their own style though.
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Yes I see the vaselinex brothers below. That does explain why so many of your entries are about dicks... Get distracted easily huh?
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Why isn't this post on Trending, this is a must read for every future whale! @ironshield
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Need to buy more votes... 😆 gimme a minute
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Wot amayzing poast!!!
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😉 hahaha love the "poast" - typing that made my autocorrect haywire
May need to commission you for a jingle! This series could really use a catchy tune.. Hmmmm...maybe I need to assemble a Shitpost acapella group and really get this party going!!
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Hmm, maybe I can come up with a little song. I'll have a think about it.
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Taht would AWESOME10 @steevc!! I would certainly have to send a few more guitar picks for that 😉
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Well look what happened :)
https://steemit.com/shitposting/@steevc/a-possible-theme-for-grow-pro-s-shitpost-series
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I tottally aggree wiht thiss posst! Kepp wrighting thiis 💩serries!!!
Foolow mee! Uplike for uplike? Resbd for resbd?
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L😆L
thanks for that @cmoljoe! Gotta have some fun, write? hahaha
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Yas, oldways! 😁
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This is an exceptional post talking about shitpost. It's almost breaking the 4th wall.
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i am sew empressed wif dis powst!
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Lolololol. Awesome and sadly full of truth.
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I figure might as well laugh since humor is never far from truth 😆
I'm trying the oldschool approach here:
go ahead, stick your finger in that electrical socket
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Lol
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Lol if you don't shit post you lose! Thats the steemit way
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We have an opportunity to change that and there are many people working toward solutions. Then there's me...LOL Trying a different approach and just aiming for laughs... Like when I go bowling... I aim for the gutter so I'm never disappointed 😆 "1 pin...sweeeet!"
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Lol well that's what steemit is about is it not, a marketplace of ideas without censorship all ideas are equal and open to interpretation and if you're not having fun with it then this really isn't the platform for you
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BOOOOOM!!! Well put, @chekohler!!
And....just like that... A new Steemit constitution was born 😆👍
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Love it!
I need to learn how to use bots more!
Or I should use the tips in this to earn more!
Hours of work for 30 cents STD is not affecting my motivation at all.
just a bit of sarcasm.
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@berniesanders is going to LOVE this post lol
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Let's hope so for my sake...LOL That flag is a hammer and my skull is dense but not hard enough to withstand one of those over my head 😂
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Hahahaha what a gr8 way 2 send yer msg.
This cracked me up.
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😋 thanks a million @lovenfreedom! I had a lot of fun creating this and I'm glad to know it is amusing to others (makes me feel normal-er) 😂
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Agreed 70% ,
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@aamir37, I appreciate that 72% 😋
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Well, obviousley you are on to something here. Look at all the comments! And all those votes. Im betting when the price of Steem goes up you make a shit load!
Now, where I grew up the dfogs had a piss post in the yard. ANd we had a double hole shitter out back. But we did not have a shit post. And like the saying goes we were so poor we didnt have a pot to piss in. Well, thats not exactly tru. We did, we just didnt need it. We boys would just go out the back door and piss off the back porch. Why not? Always felt sorry for the girls. Especially in the winter when they had to go out to the shitter. That's why they have two holes in the shitter you know. For the women.
they like to piss and talk, or shit and talk. Made no matter. Talk. Talk. Talk.
One night I acidentaly pissed on the pot tho. Dang that was some smelly weed. I never told anyone. 'but everytone thought it was pretty dank. You know. I was stoned when I did it. 'but I was pretty much stoned all the time anyway.
So I think I'll fit right in here on Steemit. I see the Nigerians are just shitposting away. I think alot of them are like we were. Poor. Did you know there are 200 millin Nigerians? It's true. Danm! Thats alot of Nigerians. If you live in Nigeria do you call yourslef a Niger or a Nigerian or what? I guess thats were the N word came from. Maybe thats where bongs come from. Dont they have bongo's over there? Bongo's in the Congo's.
So How about Shit comments? Can you shit comment your way to suckcess? I think I can if you can.
Thanks you inspired me. PLease vote for me. YOu know. I meaqn you have 937 f'ing votes. You can aford one. Illl take that one from rocky1.
My shitty vote right now is worth what? 10 cents or something like that.
Whooppeeeee. Shitamarou and donky doo.
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You made my sunburned face almost blush, @mistermercury. Well, that could just be my blood pressure since I'm a stay home Dad of two kids.. 😆
We need to slap a title on that bohemoth of a comment:
HisTORY 101
That is how it's done, kids! I will be reading this as our newest addition to story time at bedtime, I'll add BLEEPS since they are only 3 & 4.5 but they'll get the essence of it, I'm sure. Sure, they teach a ton on Sesame Street, but we all know the real life lessons happen in an alley or the gutter where the rats play.
I appreciate this one, buddy! Made me laugh and if ya don't laugh - you will cry...please don't cry 🍻😎
I'll have to send some of the force your way... They don't call me Growp-Ya fur nuthin
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You are telling lie coz your post is not a shit....
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✌️😎 THANK YOU!
I try my best like many great authors here and I appreciate all of you readers that make Steemit enjoyable for many of us. Keep DREAMIN' n STEEMIN', my friend
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Thanks for inspiring me I am new here and I really need apreciation from people like you @grow-pro ☺☺
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Everyone has something to share with the world and everyone has something to learn ✌️😉
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Hmm you are right but not everyone wants to learn from others.
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Hi dear if u want than we will work togather for steem earnings plz upvote my post i will follow u back thanks
https://steemit.com/football/@shoaibchheena/football-worldcup-here-all-matches-updates
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Everyone starts at rep 25 and you are 21..
you are growing backwards 😆
Wonder why?
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U MAN ARE ARE A TRU HERO OF STEAM!!!! C U AT THE TOP! 😅
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This is hilarious.
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Thanks @mimidee74, hopefully, this is only the beginning of the laughs!
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Nice, but what about shit-commenting ?💩
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Nice! Reading ahead... A+
Let the class catch up and we will get into that 😆
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It's even better when it is a shit post, and then they upvote their own replies to it over and over to milk it even more. Ugh.
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Hey, only so many ways to invest, have to choose one 😂
You should upvote your comment since it is par with the course material! A fine example that autocorrect does work and grammar can exist online.
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greta post nice I like it much
i upvote U and U upvote me ok
pls if you can chick my blog
P.S. Just for the sake of clarity, I have not upvoted, resteemed or followed you. Sorry, but rules are rules!
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Total how many lessons would be there? :)
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Maybe 10 or so..it has been a lot of fun making these
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Hey! @grow-pro. In the same didactic vibe, I suspect I've today approved your 3 lesson course so far with gold medals. };)
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Very nice post,if you are not too good in writing,you can opt for investing through some robot
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Very true! You could even create your own Steemit-based business, freelance work on #steemgigs / @steemgigs / https://steemgigs.org, or invest in one of the many bots out there. Plenty of ways to earn and grow here 😉
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Am planning to do that after I have made some great earning through writing,maybe you will be the one to lead me through
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always never never had more in accordance with this post jajajajajajaja and I think not something positive but sometimes it is nice to break the rules and feel a bit of adrenaline
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😂 speak your mind @opiman
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@grow-pro Dis is d biga boolish kind of thing 2 post on stimit, wt do u think????
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I like it, well done. B+
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Really vry good job
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Congratulations! This post has been upvoted from the communal account, @minnowsupport, by grow-pro from the Minnow Support Project. It's a witness project run by aggroed, ausbitbank, teamsteem, theprophet0, someguy123, neoxian, followbtcnews, and netuoso. The goal is to help Steemit grow by supporting Minnows. Please find us at the Peace, Abundance, and Liberty Network (PALnet) Discord Channel. It's a completely public and open space to all members of the Steemit community who voluntarily choose to be there.
If you would like to delegate to the Minnow Support Project you can do so by clicking on the following links: 50SP, 100SP, 250SP, 500SP, 1000SP, 5000SP.
Be sure to leave at least 50SP undelegated on your account.
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i am impressed keep it up great work
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Great comment, thank you
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https://steemit.com/football/@shoaibchheena/football-worldcup-here-all-matches-updates
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omg i love this post
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@grow-pro https://steemit.com/mgsc/@vichar/shayri-8a8f4029586a7
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Hi bro if u want earnings than work togather upvote me i follow u back
https://steemit.com/football/@shoaibchheena/football-worldcup-here-all-matches-updates
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