Single suddenly? Scared? Overwhelmed? You got this!

in single •  7 years ago 

I've been a single mom for 11 years. Wait - nearly 12.
My advice: Do so much self love and care - empathise with yourself, bath, read, look yourself in the mirror each day and notice the good about you- often ending a relationship we only point out the bad. Love yourself loads.

When things get awful and stressed - and they will at times - go into self care mode - breathe deeply, do less things so you don't spin, go simple, just focusing on loving yourself and kids and let other things go... And LAUGH - in the worst spots watch clips of comedy each day so you view life with humour and goodness. Then you're more likely laugh at yourself rather than react and get angry/depressed.

Go outside - and get fresh air - breathe in goodness, and breathe out the staleness of a lack of love! Study relationships - emotional abuse, passive aggression, healthy love (John Gottman), communication (Hold me tight, sue johnson), and how to get into a healthy relationship (Conscious Dating).... So that you choose a person who adores you and you're aligned.

Focus daily on love, and games to play with your kids. Read parenting books, don't watch TV late - do to bed early and meditate. I still read/listen to parenting books so that I can improve my parenting (How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk is Fabulous!).

And - study! In my down time - rather than watch TV I studied to improve - so my kids saw me doing something. So the times they went to their dad I studied - and I HATE studying and exams. I was one of those kids taken into an isolated special needs class with 6 people in the room. THAT bad. But I pushed myself. I did a 3 year masters. I had to work harder than others to get B's when they were getting straight A's and doing less hours. It was online. I did many others- coaching, counselling and attachment therapy courses... Now I'm on a course on how to write a book.

Grow yourself so that you're improving and thriving... So when you meet someone you're not needy/desperate - but blossoming and radiant DSC03232.JPG

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

Congratulations @zariyakaialufu! You received a personal award!

Happy Birthday! - You are on the Steem blockchain for 2 years!

You can view your badges on your Steem Board and compare to others on the Steem Ranking

Vote for @Steemitboard as a witness to get one more award and increased upvotes!