The Mural

in sleeplessness •  7 years ago 

so here i am, another 2am. no sleep. shit on my mind, yet again. so i thought, screw it, get some of this shit written down. see if it helps. so without further ado...


It feels like only yesterday. The memories are so real.
Every time I pass through town, I see it. The tribute to you.
I always say hi. People probably think I am crazy if they see it. But I don't care.

I know I am not alone. I know, by the amount of people that came to see you off, that you had touched so many.
The void seems endless.
MOST days I wonder how I will go on.
MOST nights I lay thinking. Missing.

I tell those around me that I am doing OK. BUT I'M NOT.
I tell MYSELF that YOU are no longer suffering.
Like that is supposed to make it less real.
Like that is supposed to make it hurt less.
Like that will help me make it through the day.

But again, night after night, I just lay there.
Thinking.
And then daybreak comes. And yet again I've not rested. Yet again I feel drained and lethargic.

And STILL, I keep my pain to myself.
Because no one knows what to say to soothe the pain.
Because no one knows what to say to make the images behind my eyelids go away.
Because EVERYONE is going through something similar.

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