Artist Holly RorkesteemCreated with Sketch.

in steemit •  7 years ago  (edited)

"I came across a journal post about an internet troll and another user’s name popped up. At the time, I was only interested in what you did, not that person. I contacted the user, whom I will only refer to as SKN, and asked them about the incident. They linked me to the journals, the comments, and even to the other user, whom I believe suffers from some kind of mental disorder and needs professional help. Not only did you blatantly cyber bullied SKN, but you did it relentlessly, even though you had no fight in the arguments between the two. I found that absolutely deplorable. You purposefully antagonized them and around the holidays no less when peace on Earth and good will towards men is always encouraged. After speaking to them, they sent me the contacts to a fellow artist friend of theirs. We decided to go with them instead. I don’t want someone who is willing to go after an innocent artist just because they either feel insecure or want some sick form of vigilante justice. You are a vile, vicious and petty individual and I don’t want you to be associated with my projects or company. I have forwarded my findings to many European and Asian developers in order to get you blacklisted from their upcoming projects as well. Good luck with your future projects but I highly suggest practice online etiquette and clean up your act before you start working with others."

That is one of many fake emails from Casey pretending to be a potential employer entitled "Artist for Fairy Tale Project"

her name Silver-KitsuneNeko on DA - she also is the users Pagewolf and PsychCircus77 and RayofLife and NovaLibra all the same

This is really hard for me to talk about, because I don't like to think of myself as a victim. Whenever this part of my life comes up I feel quite powerless to the situation.

I feel powerless because Casey has made this a very "she -said - he said" situation. So I got to a point where I felt like telling the truth was pointless because she would always emotionally manipulate and counter it with a lie, that her subscribers believed. Because the truth is, she seems like a sweet person just not to anybody that criticizes her. This is what I have realized about Casey, because in a way her online bullying has caused me to act like her in a way. I picked up on her baggage and I carried it forward into my own life. She was effecting my behavior and I realized more and more I was becoming the toxicity that she was on a personal level. She triggered my toxicity, I suppose and over time, I realized I was becoming just like her.

She suddenly made me hyper sensitive to criticism. Her reaction to my correction of her was so manipulatively/childish/hurtful that I took on her sad character over time. Someone needing self pity, someone who needed a "Safe space". Because that is what she was calling for, a safe space. A place devoid of criticism.

Now after her long term gas lighting, and guilt tripping, and cat fishing I felt so angry at anyone that would give me even the simplest of crits. Because if I couldn't criticize people (because it would cause crazy people like Casey to online harass me) I felt like I needed to just block out anyone that would give me any criticism. (I thought don't be like Casey - rise above) She would do something online to me again and again and each time I would just blow it off and say "Rise above it." I thought she was clearly just insecure. But she made me feel insecure and so I would just cut out and block anyone that corrected me even over the simplest of things. I cut out DA because of her.

It didn't help that I had a first boyfriend that corrected my sentence formation, grammar and spelling as well.

So I thought if someone can do it to me, it was ok to do it to someone else. I didn't use gentle enough kid gloves, I suppose because she is constantly perpetuating the same toxic cycles and her actions have made me quite suicidal. Which is funny because she calls for safe spaces. But she never afforded me that, she went straight to vindictive unstable person that needed to hurt me because I corrected her grammar and spelling, of all fucking things! ME? ME, getting an online bully because I corrected her grammar. (Because of this I get a slight twitch in the face when people try to correct my spelling or gramar, I take on her sad persona I suppose.)

So she decided that was a good time to cat fish me, playing a long term back and forth where she pretended to be potential clients. Emailing me in the hopes she could get back at me for telling her off for freaking out at me online. She created a fake company and staff - pretending to be clients emailing me, to try to tell me how much she disliked my artwork and writing. Like basically ripping apart my gallery pretending to be some big wig company interested in hiring me as a freelancer. Trying to string me along hoping I would bite at her bizarre emails.

So, she was pretty obvious I thought, because her spelling and grammar and poor story telling skills gave her away pretty fast. The thing about Casey, is that she actually really easy to catch in a lie. So I was right in addressing her writing could use work, it is usually too out of touch as her stories tend to be. She has no basis in reality because she hasn't experienced enough of life. She is just stuck in fan-fiction and so doesn't know what real companies do and say to online freelancers. When she bullies online she always gives herself away in ridiculous ways. Like she is a character in her fan-fictions. So in a way it became like swatting away a very strange and insecure fly. But she would always turn so toxic and manipulative of her subscribers.

I hated how her lies had got them all on her side. Basically, I grammar checked and spell checked her and in turn she told me off, blocked me and posted a diary entry that I was harassing her and to stay away from my account because I was a troll. So I got back to her on my other account and told her she was being rather fucking crazy over my simple corrections. And thats how her harassment of me started. I actually thought I was helping her at the time. The story was being ruined by the misspelled and missing words. Sometimes whole paragraphs made no sense because she missed words completely. It took away from the read, things where hard to follow. So I took offense that my correction made me a troll of her worthy of posting about in a "stay away way" I admit when she started getting aggressive with me I fed back my complete disgust of her lies.

Ha ha, I guess I triggered her and she in turn triggered me. Back and forth of comments ensued, where I expressed she was being quite crazy in her words and actions towards me. Her lies made me kinda trolly to her at this point because I felt she was being absurd to me. I guess this truth really quite upset her, because months later after I thought we lived in a world where people have lives, she started cat fishing me.

I really got upset at what she was doing at this point. When she was catfishing me, was the saddest/most depressing part of my life. I felt like by not calling her out on all the bullying and harassing and lies that she was taking my last little bit of power away. So I engaged her, telling her I would reveal all her lies to her readers. I told her I had proof of all her toxic behavior and me and my friends started leaving comments basically telling her the truth was out - "Everybody knows you are a crazy online bully now."
and I told her if she would only apologize to me and leave me alone I would make it all go away. Because she is actually quite insecure she buckled and confessed and said a very begrudging "Sorry" to me.

But it wasn't enough. She had to keep on lying in her journal entries. I lost a friend because I told him that by really engaging her anymore we where just bothering a really sad person. So yeah, I lost a friend in trying to defend the crazy actions of my online bully. The whole ordeal pulled me off DA entirely.

Her pity fest journal entries made me suicidal because inside I knew all about her. I knew what she did to people that didn't like her work. I believe she has been leaving rather ridiculous critiques on any comic or project I worked on, subtly trying to claim I used the stock and was hinting at art thievery - tagging my name to the reviews and then tagging #revenge and what not in the tags to let me know she was trying to get pay back for making her feel uncomfortable for cyber-bullying and harassing me. She thought she would tag my name to some nice reviews she left. You can always tell a Casey review...

Cherry on top is her tagging my full name Holly Rorke Green in her latest post advocating suicide awareness, that people online critiquing you should be more considerate because it can set someone off. I guess I am responding to the hypocrisy of her words here, considering.

She was the one that was attempting to make me suicidal and I was trying to deal with real life and move on from this drama.

She kept pushing me in sick ways to finally come back and put down my complete truth here and now.

She has denied it all before and I am sure she will deny it all again. So take this post or leave it, I don't care. I won't fake the victim, or seek a pittyfest like her after this. I have already experienced so much bullshittery from this experience that I just don't care anymore. She wants to defame me, she wants to use my name and critique me, go for it. IF she wants to fake wallow in it and sap up sympathy cause that what she needs in her life to get by...go for it I guess. It's sad, but I guess everybody needs something to do with their life. Everybody needs to feel loved and don't like it when others don't love don't love them for whatever reason... but I hope that when I commit suicide from your continued harassment of me, that you eat your own words and one day karma really comes for you.

That is why I haven't been here for a long time because of Silver-KitsuneNeko. I totally threw away my gallery because of her and how she was being to me. I was already quite depressed already.

I am sure she will insist her troll army come after me in some drama spealed journal entry on how I am lying about it all. Because that is what bullies do. They need others to justify their toxic behavior. But my hope is that it is truly done now and our truths are out there for the world to judge and weigh us both now.

I just wanted to thank you Casey, you forced me to be a better writer, you forced me to be ok with myself because I didn't want to be someone petty like you anymore. I wanted to change, if it wasn't for you my life would not of gotten better. The way you treated me made me a stronger person now. It made me realize that I can always rise above the haters. It taught me that there are really sensitive people on the internet and even the ones you would never suspect can be the real trolls. I realized that I can always rise above you Casey. My hope is that we can finally stop this now. My hope is that you go on and be a great and wonderful writer. My hope that you have thicker skin with the next person that points out your mistakes. My hope is that we both learn from this lesson and can grow as people. My hope is that we can stop these childish games and grow up. I hope you go on in life and grow. Disregard the haters - your response to haters are very toxic and I reflected it at you, I just mirror what toxicity someone is doing to me until they see themselves and leave me alone, so try to meditation next time it will feel better than "revenge" for making you feel bad about your behavior. I will just keep feeding your negative behavior back to you and we can just carry on that way if you really want.

So -- FYI
I am sorry to any person or project associated to me, that will be effected by Casey now, or in the future. I wasn't nice to a girl online over grammer and now all our work has to pay. I hope you read this journal entry, and consider whether it was a real review or just Casey or a friend of hers leaving it for her. LEt her know of your thoughts about any reviews by giving her body of work the same courtesy she did yours.

#hollyrorke #artisthollyrorke

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Is this your own artwork?

It is a photomanipulation that I painted over this is the original public domain image.

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