What does it mean to hate someone for no reason?

What does it mean to hate someone for no reason? 

Deep down  inside we all feel a sense of lack, like we're not really good enough. We seek external validation, affirmation, approval, achievement, etc to  'prove' to ourselves that really we are good enough. Of course we all  know that this is a pointless pursuit. Does someone else's opinion of  me, good or bad, actually change anything about me? 

Of course not! 

Does  achieving some external thing do anything at all to change who I  intrinsically am inside? 

Obviously not!

Nonetheless here we are,  constantly looking for these external affirmations. This means that the  external world and everything in it holds the power we seek, and  therefore everything is the object of our desire, and simultaneously a  threat. It is all a threat because it holds sway over how we feel about  ourselves.

Rub someone the right way, feel great! Rub them the wrong way  and receive an onslaught of 'proof' that we really aren't good enough.  And so we go on and on, secretly coveting all that elusive validation. This selfishly uses, deceives, and manipulates all those around us. And the greatest part? This is usually without even realizing that we're doing it. 

When things don't go our way, we get angry. The close cousins to anger is upset, being resentful, and even hate.  But notice where that hatred comes from? The source is from within! It  is because I hate myself that I feel I NEED that validation, and I can't  stand when anyone or anything gets in my way, Why? because it hurts so badly  when they do. This is baseless hatred. 

The hebrew word rayecha (fellow), comes from a shared root with the word ra (evil). Love thy evil as thyself.  My self rejection is manifest in the fact that I simply don't accept  certain aspects about myself. I am not loving my (perceived) 'evil' as I  love those other 'good' points in me. 

This is why I seek external validation. 

This then becomes the reason why I perceive the external world as a threat. In actuality this is all because I reject myself. So how can I really love my fellow like myself if I don't fully love myself?  Imagine your best friend confided in you that they feel really down  about themselves. They say they're selfish, manipulative, stressed out,  not accomplishing their potential, out of control etc. etc. They're  your best friend. You love them. Accept them. You think they're being  too hard on themselves and you tell them so.

"Hey, lighten up. You're a  great person!" Everyone has imperfections, and that's ok. It's called  being human." And there you go being fully supportive and accepting.   So why the double standard towards ourselves? Why can't we tell  ourselves (and mean it), that exact thing? I fully accept and love myself  EXACTLY THE WAY I AM, with all the 'bad' points included. 

Everyone has  imperfections, AND THAT'S OK. It's called being human. And you're great  just the way you are." Elul is classically known as the time of  the year that we put it all together before our 'big judgment' on Rosh  hashanah. But this year let's look at the REAL source of all the stuff  we think we need to 'repent' for, and stop focusing on the external  distractions. This month learn to fully embrace, accept and love  yourself AS YOU ARE. That includes all the  'imperfections', and you will see how  easy it is with that state of mind how to truly love your fellow as yourself!

(Credited to a friend on facebook)

BB613