I Have Been Slacking

For the past week or so, I’ve been very lazy with the content I produce to Steemit

I have been posting twice a day, quite regularly, but I haven’t been posting the best of material. You have seen more camera phone photos than ever before, and all those throwbacks weren’t purely because I wanted to share and thought they might interest you, but they were also because I have been too fucking lazy to shoot new material. I have had some good ideas for writing but I have mostly done a half-ass job with those too for the past few weeks. I have been scatterbrained and unmotivated, I don’t even have any good outside elements I could blame for my lacking content, the circumstances have been more than favourable for all sorts of photography.

Did anyone even notice?

Nobody has come out and said anything straight to me about my post quality, but I think it might be partly because of fear. I have some influence and people might be afraid to judge me out in the open, in fear of retaliation from either me or someone who supports me.

You are all allowed to voice out if you feel like I’m not giving you your moneys/times worth, though I could also argue that you can always just click away. But constructive criticism is always welcome. Yeah sure, I might get a little pissed when judged and try to defend myself, but it only hurts if I know it is true.

The only person who said anything semi negative about my posting lately, is a friend who is not even on Steemit, but who checks up on my blog every day, and pointed out that I haven’t posted in over 24 hours.

I needed a break

I have been a full time Steemian, making 2-3 posts per day, for over six months know. That is A LOT, there are not many other people who do so, and do it successfully. Sure you can post crappy camera phone pictures and memes all day every day with minimum effort, but I’m talking about well crafter posts that have quality pictures and good writing. It is hard work to do that every day, but that is the path I have chosen. I’ve been border line obsessed about Steemit, scratch that, I AM OBSESSED ABOUT STEEMIT. It took over my whole life, made it better, but I also desperately needed a break.

I’ve been sleeping 8 to 10 hours a day, like a fucking baby kitten, and sunbathing for the rest of the day, like the sloth I am. I have been going out, which is actually really good because I don’t have a social life, but also I used that as an excuse for myself to slack on Steemit. Bad Steemian, very bad Steemian!

I am going to be brutally honest with you guys; I needed a break from creating content, but I didn’t want a break from the money. So I put quantity over quality. I didn't want to miss out on the opportunity to grow my stash of Steem and SBD, but every once in a while I need a break from creating quality content. I’m never going to lie to you that the money doesn’t matter, when it clearly does and this is how I pay my bills. I don’t wanna go back to the kitchen!

Responsibility

It doesn’t take a Sherlock to figure out that a substantial amount of the upvotes I get come from automated votes. Votes from people that have followed me for a long time and want to support what I do. They are not here every hour of every day to check to see what I post and whether it is good, instead they trust that I put out content that is worthy of their vote every day. I think I owe it to them to keep up to the highest standard I have raised myself to.

False sense of security

Having big auto-votes creates a false sense of security. You get lulled to a belief that you will forever and always get those votes, no matter what you do, and it’s a very dangerous mentality to have. There is no written contract that promises me a certain number of votes, the percentages, or dollars on my work. All of it can be taken away in a heartbeat, just like it was given to me. Nobody has to tell you why you get the upvote, and nobody has to explain if they take it away. I definitely don’t want this all to go away because I started slacking and cutting corners.

Comfort is the enemy of progress

I have been resting on my laurels for some time, and it’s fucking disgusting. Like I mentioned earlier, nobody has called me out on this, but I set high standards for myself and I haven’t met those standards like I know I can. I am not a pro photographer, model or writer, and I have so much more to learn and give in all those areas. I just have to do it. I need to keep studying and making myself better in all those areas, there is never a point where I could say I’ve done or learned enough, never!

I don’t have a boss

That is what I have always wanted, to not have anyone tell me what to do and when to do it, but to be my own boss. Well I got what I asked for, and I always knew there would be times when I would need to be more strict with myself. And quite frankly, I need a spanking right about now! I have been giving myself days off, and haven’t been demanding better quality work from myself.

I need to push myself harder, I need to up my game, I need to shoot more, model more, go out there and do my fucking job. I need to entertain you, my audience, if I want to be successful. And I want to be, not just on Steemit, I want to take everything I do to the next level. This is only the starting point and I’m only rehearsing.

I am sorry

I apologise to my loyal followers, who continue to give me love and support, even when I don’t always deserve it. I say sorry to the people who have me on their auto-vote list and have trusted me to produce high quality posts on a regular basis.

But most of all, I am asking for forgiveness from myself, because I know I can do better. I don’t want to look back at my work and be disappointed in myself.

I have so much passion and drive, I just need to keep harnessing it and always push myself to the next level!