Things I like as much as dealing with Australian internet providers-
Performing a self vasectomy with a spoon. Inside of a tornado whilst listening to Oprah Winfrey recite the name of everyone she’s given a car too.
Dragging my scrotum across a meat ant nest, and the meat ants have rabies.
Eating live ferrets wielding razor blades.
Watching Kanye West draw a portrait of Nicholas Cage drawing a portrait of Fran Drescher.
The idea of super glueing ear phones in and playing 2 Nikki Minaj songs.
Getting jumped by a gang of badgers. The badgers also have explosive diarrhoea and a blood lust that makes Viking beserkers look like fucking choir boys.
Listening to a millennial pitching a pyramid scheme whilst ordering a coffee from a hipster.
Eating a cake made of cobras.
People who say that Darwin’s Theory of Evolution “is just a theory”
Angry white middle class male feminists with a yeast infection that also believes the world is flat and dinosaurs didn’t exist.
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