What are we really doing here?

in steemit •  7 years ago 

Questioning Everything

I've been doing a lot of soul searching and personal reflection in the past few days. I've been questioning my own purpose, questioning where it is I belong, and where our current world is headed.
Facebook was a revolution for me, personally. I have NEVER followed the crowd. I have been an 'Outsider' for literally as long as I can remember. I don't follow fashion, I don't follow fads, I don't go along with the popular idea because everyone else does. I don't follow organized religion. I'm more used to being a minority than you would guess. I didn't grow up playing video games either. Opened a Myspace account only when it was already a pretty much dead platform. I had already witnessed friends who were too engaged in their phones and status updates to keep their attention on the people and events that were in front of them, in the present; I was loathe to join their mindless ranks.
But I succumbed eventually, around 2012, and my life was truly forever changed.

I had found my tribe.

For the first time in my life, I had stumbled upon other misfits. People who questioned everything. People who hated authority and rules. People who had also been different as children, without understanding why. I found a community of friends who answered my questions with questions of their own! People who were not only completely unafraid of my questioning nature, but invited me to question MORE about my current reality than anyone had before. The truth of it is, the Facebook community took me by the hand and lovingly, led me right to the hole of rabbit holes.

I dove in. Head first. I became engrossed and obsessed about anything 'truther' related. It started with 9/11, which led me to JFK, which in turn led me to the Federal Reserve, the 13 Bloodlines, Illuminati, the sinking of the Titanic!!!
I see news on TV as fake. I see the fear they propogate. I became an Anti-vaxxer, by diligently reading article upon article and watching YouTube videos of parents sharing their own heartbreaking stories.
This journey has been an amazing one.

But... lately I'm not sure what there is to be gained by Facebook, or Steemit for that matter.
I open my phone or my laptop to an almost constant flow of negativity and just negative energy. My feed is inundated with endless videos and articles of police brutality to the extent that we can no longer keep up with victims' names, there are just too many. FAR TOO MANY. I scroll down and it's dogs chained up their whole lives. Or someone cutting off a pitbulls' ears. Setting kittens on fire. Industrial cruelty on the food we feed ourselves and our children, our future...
GMO'S, pesticides, oh and let's not forget Monsanto or the newest Evil Monopoly that is Nestle.
The #MeToo movement was a monumental legacy, but even that came with backlash.
I became so caught up in finally having found some beautiful souls that I also became blind to the hatred that is running rampant in my country.

I'm not even sure the point of this rant. I just know that I've felt extremely disoriented the last few days. I go to bed, but my mind keeps racing around topics, acceptance, and whether I've done what I can with social media and maybe it's just time to move on...

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I love you Sis!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Sending you massive hugs!! xo It's gonna be all good, we are Tribe <3 <3 xoxo You are Amazing, You Matter <3 <3 And whatever way you choose, always stay in touch with me <3 <3 <3