Recovery -Day 68 of the steemitschool 100 day writing challenge by @d-pend

in steemitschoolpoetry •  7 years ago  (edited)

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Once upon a dream
on the island of misfit toys
we watched the world fall silent
Mother had finally beaten the virus
after the funeral fires
life was finally beautiful

(Image credit Dave Renike and a portrait of the fair jubilee made by myself turned into this here universal truth meme) 1146410_626398614061443_1547687283_o.jpg

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art courtesy of @PegasusPhysics

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beautiful.

The line "Mother had finally beat the virus" seemed odd to me) I couldn't figure out what's bugging me here: has beaten? Had beaten? I've never heard "had beat", but I guess it exists beyond my knowledge...

Short poems are charming!!!!
Mother of your piece is The Mother Earth, huh?!

it's slang, proper english would be she had beaten. And yes Gia herself ... am gonna use the proper english ...now it bugs me , LOL ...

Ahaha, your foreign reader gets confused, yeah) but it adds something to your style, I'm not sure you should change it!