FINAL CHAPTER of The Allies of Old; Book Two Renewal: "Darkness is Coming"

in story •  7 years ago  (edited)



Reborn2.jpg
Book Cover created in acrylic by the extremely talented @therealpaul


If you have not read the first book of the series, "Reborn", it is advisable you do so before reading "Renewal" or you will be lost. This link will provide you with a series summary as well as all sixty-eight chapters of Reborn

Table of Contents for Fifty Five chapters of Renewal, created by @bashadow

Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62
Chapter 63
Chapter 64
Chapter 65
Chapter 66
Chapter 67
Chapter 68
Chapter 69
Chapter 70
Chapter 71
Chapter 72
Chapter 73
Chapter 74
Chapter 75
Chapter 76
Chapter 77
Chapter 78
Chapter 79
Chapter 80
Chapter 81
Chapter 82
Chapter 83
Chapter 84
Chapter 85




Chapter Eighty-Six


Anna sighed as she hung up with Jenna. The conversation had made her uneasy. Though she’d assured Anna that everything was fine, the fact that she’d gone to a hotel coupled with the false cheer in her voice said otherwise. Something to do with Mathias she knew, she’d heard Jenna sneaking off to his room all week long.

And then there was Jess who had looked so fearful and miserable when they’d left her with Michael at the cabin...

“What is it little one?” Jared broke into her thoughts and scooped her up, bringing her eye level. He wasn’t wearing a shirt and she was momentarily distracted by his powerful arms. She planted a kiss on one before telling him what she’d been thinking.

He smiled gently. “Michael will do the right thing, he’s not the sort of male who would abandon his responsibility.”

She frowned harshly and said peevishly, “I know for a fact she wants nothing to do with his “sense of obligation”.”

He chuckled causing her frown to deepen.

“Don’t be like that,” he kissed her cheeks. “They just need time. If you love her than I’m certain she possesses qualities worth loving and Michael will eventually see them.”

She smacked his shoulder at his thinly veiled insult then asked, “What about Jenna?”

It was his turn to frown. “Relationships between humans and vampires rarely end well.”

Anna sighed. “Yeah, well maybe one of them figured that out and that’s why she left.”

Jared started to speak but was interrupted by his phone. He put her down and answered. “Talk to me.”

“LeJarien?”

“Yes?”

“This is Leo Matridan, I’m a friend of Michael’s. I’m sorry to bother you, but Michael is busy and this is important.”

Anna smirked at the word “busy” and Jared flashed a grin before responding. “What can I do for you?”

Leo cleared his throat and when he spoke there was an odd strained note in his voice. “My brother has spent the past several months hunting down ancient scrolls and recently returned to London having finally met with success.” He paused, taking in a breath. “The ciphering has been a bit labored since it was written in a dead language, but what we’ve translated so far…well it seems we’ve found the true origin of the Faerian race.” Another pause.

Anna furrowed her brows. Leo seemed shaken and she wondered what they could have uncovered to cause it. As the pause stretched she met Jared’s eyes whose expression mirrored her own.

Leo finally cleared his throat and continued. “The Faerians did not originate from another world as many have speculated throughout the centuries, though they were not entirely from this one either… yes I realize that doesn’t make sense, in fact I’m still reeling from….perhaps I should have waited to make this call, but I…,” his sigh was audible and strained. “The Asuras….mated with humans. Faerians were the result.”

His words seemed to fall through the phone like jagged pieces of metal and the quality of his voice sounded as if the verbal shrapnel was cutting him as they formed. For a moment Anna stood blinking uncomprehendingly. When it sunk in her eyes widened in disbelief.

Jared stared at her, his own eyes starting to flash as he spoke into the phone. “So what you’re telling me is demons mated and bred with humans?”

“Yes.”

“Well that’s- that will take a moment to digest,” Jared’s face had paled, and he brought one large hand up to rifle through his golden hair.

Anna’s gaze sharpened. For a moment she’d been thinking of only her Faerian ancestry, forgetting that she and her mate shared this lineage. Vampires had mated with Faerians just as humans had.

Leo spoke again, though his words came hesitantly. “There’s more. Along with the Faerian scrolls we also found the diary of a Faerian female by the name of Ellessyia. She wrote the journal shortly after mating with one of the original vampires, a male called LeSantriade’Cantre. According to what she was told by LeSantria, the original vampires were not from this plane of existence, they were in fact what we think of as Angels.

They volunteered to serve on Earth, sacrificing a great deal to do so. They were of course altered from their original selves in order to exist on this plane.”
When Leo paused once more Jared shut his eyes, massaging his temple with two fingers. “Our fangs were the alteration, since angels have no need to eat.”

“Yes. The need for and consumption of blood was what tied your race to the earth, though of course there were other differences though more than likely that has to do with the density of this atmosphere, gravity, etc. in comparison to where they came from. And then after they began mating with the Faerians the resulting offspring rent other changes as well…what with the introduction of human and demon blood. Although you can at least claim pure angelic DNA, whereas we…”

“Actually,” Jared cut him off, “from what I was taught the Asuras fell from grace by their actions and choices. That doesn’t change what they originally were.” He smiled reassuringly at Anna. “My little lira is no more a demon than Mother Theresa.”

There was a smile in Leo’s voice when he answered. “That is certainly a more positive way to view it. Finn is currently chasing down yet another lead on some old texts, so hopefully I will have more to report soon. Many questions have been raised in my mind over the past few days, and I have theories which I had intended to discuss with Michael, but now I think I will take a step back before I get ahead of myself. I doubt I need to advise you to be cautious and gentle when you relay this information to others?”

Jared barked a laugh. “No you certainly don’t.”

“I’ll be in touch soon.”

Jared tossed the phone on the bed and Anna approached him slowly, feeling shaken. His gaze was unfocused and she could almost hear his mind working out the implications of what they’d learned.

She wrapped her arms around his waist, feeling the need to be comforted from a nameless strangeness, as her mind stretched to accept the potentially life altering information. He pressed one large hand against her back, rubbing it absently and she smiled a little despite the ache in her chest as she thought about what he’d said about choice.

She took his hand. “What you said was right. It doesn’t matter if our ancestors were demons or the Devil himself, we choose who and what we become.”

He smiled warmly down at her, bringing his other hand to her cheek. They stood there quietly for a few moments, love vibrating between them, so strong that it gave energy and life to her words.

But after a bit Jared's smile faded and he turned slightly toward the window.

"I fear we are running short on time," he said grimly, "for darkness is coming. And when it gets here we had better be ready."

What might happen if they were not prepared hung in the air like a cold mist.

A chill ran up Anna's spine as she watched her mate regard the window as though the darkness was a living thing that even now was stretching its way toward them.

And maybe it was.


Generously created for me by @son-of-satire

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Holy! There's a lot of work here! Underrated post. Dropping you a vote for sure.

Plus, congrats to @therealpaul for his acrylic work as well.

Thank you! Although I think it caught up with itself rating wise, at least I'm quite happy with it :)
Paul's amazing. When I asked him to create the cover he plucked the exact scene from my mind and painted it :)

You're absolutely right, it caught up in votes... guess Ill earn something for being one of the first to notice the greatness of it :)

I had to put off reading this chapter yesterday, I didn't want it to end! It was a great wrap up to a couple of great books though, and I know the story's not over yet. I want to say thanks again for choosing me to paint the cover for this great work, it's really an honor to be so connected to your wonderful writing.

I feel like I know some of these characters, and some of them I can even 'see' who they are by how you let them think out loud in their own voices, I was right with them in the instant, and some of them think like me, so I know how they feel. Instead of writing what they think, you let them tell us, and such is your skill that it's like being there when the characters feel and live within the story. This is the first fictional work that I've read in a long time, and probably the only vampire story I've ever read, but I have been thoroughly enjoying the Allies so far.

Aw thanks Paul, the story is far from over! And at some point I will be commissioning you to do a separate cover for this book as I've mentioned, probably after the new year.

I'm honored to be the first vampire book you've ever read. Speaking of which, I just ran across a new book my Anne Rice which is apparently about the childhood of Jesus. Definitely interested in seeing what she came up with for that!

Also, I don't know if you saw the collage I made for today when I first put it up, if so then you would have seen your self portrait in it..but that's changed now, I managed to get a screenshot of you..ha, you'll just have to check it out and see ;)

Final chapter!? I wasn't ready!! :( To say that this took me by surprise is an understatement. You could've gone either way, but I'm doubly surprised you picked up with the "calm before the storm" type of chapter.

Since you're planning to launch the series soon, I'm going to go all in with the critique. I won't pull punches because I know that you'll be highly appreciative of the help, sis.

I'm quite torn about the overall structure of the book, mainly because there didn't really seem to be any opposition. Unlike in Reborn where Terrina came through near the end, there wasn't a climactic battle or confrontation here, which seemed odd to me. While there were a lot of things that went on, I can't help but feel that it focused heavily on the bedroom dealings and relationships of the characters. It's all well and good, and it was written very well, but considering that this is a story that should stand alone by itself, I guess that balance should be taken into account.

Sure, I get that this is just one part of a larger story, but it's still a separate story nonetheless. Just introducing Demetrius without having any real threat might make people think that this acts as sort of like a bridge between the more important books one and three.

Setting Demetrius up as a big bad is fine, I think he was introduced well enough. But, having another immediate threat that they could deal with would prove to be beneficial. This is a novel series after all instead of an ongoing serial. Maybe have Tyros pester the gang but not have a decisive outcome.

I feel there are a lot of characters that have little to do mainly because the focus was devoted mainly to the relationships. That's why Jess' intro arc with the Brothers Three stands as a real high point for Renewal for me. Even though it introduced a lot of pieces, everything felt well balanced.

I mean this with all the objectivity I could muster: there's just too much Michael. Well, there were too much Matt/Jenn as well, but that could easily be trimmed. I feel there were parts that could be condensed in a single chapter. If I recall correctly, I commented it on the chapters itself. Make them tighter so that there's room for other things.

Overall, Renewal is highly enjoyable of course, but yeah, it does feel like a bridge from the first to the third. Great job nonetheless, sis!

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

You are absolutely right, at this point this is a Bridge book, and I am not publishing it when I publish Reborn. I might do a post soon that will explain this more fully, but I won't be able to finish this book properly until I've 'basically' finished book three, and actually the same will go for each book of the series until the end. Reborn is only the way it is because I waited until I was mostly done with Renewal before doing some serious re-writing. Truthfully I kind of wish I could write the whole story from start to finish before publishing any of it, because for me it really is one long story, and not particularly stand alone books. Turning them into stand alone books is the tricky part. Though it is possible, if I stick to the formula I used for Reborn.
The only reason I even decided to put this book through when I knew it wasn't truly done, is because I didn't want to leave everyone hanging for a long time and therefore cause people to lose interest. The way I will set it up here on steemit is when I feel I have the proper end to this I will do a Special Extension for Renewal or some such thing lol, before I start putting book three through, and there's a good chance this will happen every time until I'm done. Also, aside from Reborn, steemit will not be getting the finished, polished versions of each book, not quite the rough drafts either of course, but somewhere in between.
I actually am starting to form a clear idea of how to do the end for this one as I write book three, and it only requires a few additional chapters, two of which will come in earlier on to set it up, and if it wasn't for everything going on at home I might have been able to get it done before I was forced to wrap this up, but such is life. But when it is truly ready to be published I believe your concerns will be satisfied, ones I agree with so, yeah. lol.

Maybe you could use Lord of the Rings as a blueprint? The Harry Potter books feel episodic, so I don't think it follows the same pattern. If you're not able to introduce that sort of arc to this, you might consider publishing the series as a serial instead. With that, you'll have the freedom to tell the story sequentially without needing to make them stand alone on their own.

If you choose that route, you can divide it into arcs instead (Allies of Old Book One, Book Two, etc), and with a hundred or so pages for each one. You can do a monthly serial to keep people on the hook. I forgot which podcast I've heard it on, but the serials they produce actually make more than normal books since what should be a normal novel is divided into more. Let's say The Allies of Old is made up of five books but can be divided into twenty or so different arcs. You wouldn't need to cram side stories into larger stories, you could just spin them off into their own novellas.

I've actually thought of doing that years ago, but I became employed and had to put writing... on the shelf (ha!) for a while. If I remember correctly, that podcast was hosted by three people, and they cycle with each other to co-write stuff. Author A has his own books, but also have a number of series with B and other series with C, the same goes for the other two. Ah! Collective Inkwell is what they called themselves. Wouldn't it be fun to have that sort of thing as well with Boom, Paul and others? We would be publishing under one banner, but we all have our separate independent imprints as well. Like, you have your individual one, then you have one with Boom and one with Paul, then one with me, etc. The possibilities are endless!

Really liked the structure of this ending and its similitudes with those of the Human Race! Wicked for sure! I'm considering reading the whole book!

Thank you! Actually, this was the last chapter of the second book :) There's a TOC for book one under the cover.

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nice work friend , good luck

thank you

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So sad, so ends a chapter in the life of Anna and her friends, Jess still worrying about Michael, Jenna, still fearful of life with and life with out Mathias. And now we wait, I have enjoyed your story very much, and look forward to the day the first part of book three is typed into steemit. Thank you very much for sharing your stories.

Dang, I liked it! Now I'm going to have to go back and read the whole lot from the beginning.
Resteemed, followed.

Great job on closing this book with a final chapter which leads us back into the war at hand. That will keep us all hooked in while you take your time to work on book three. This was wonderful to read to say the least, you also have my critiques for each chapter to refer back to when you need them, and feel free to ask me anything if you need insight, you know this.
I know book three will be super amounts of epic battles because this bridge isn't leading us to a dead end, you tightened up many loose knots from reborn here with renewal, and it will all pay off as future books of this series are released. great job :)

I've been reading through the comments, I love that you said something on each one :)

Could you head over to chat when you see this?

Yes indeed I shall my friend! Glad to give my input.

ayudeme votando en cualquiera de mis post. please