Book of Daehtihs – (PowerHouseCreatives Contest)

Book of Daehtihs

I am the mythological god known as Daehtihs. Silly humans should worship me simply because I can end it all anytime I want, which means if you believe in me you should be sucking up to me constantly. I tease the people with disasters and turmoil daily, but what you just wouldn’t believe, is that this particular world and its beings are just so damned entertaining that I can’t easily part with them.

If y’all piss me off enough though… well, just keep that in mind.

Yeah, I have a crazy back story, as do all we gods of mythological fantasies. In my case, I was once a common collector of cosmic dung, which was sold as fuel to make fire to heat the sun. One day, while out working hard trying to collect enough dung to meet my daily quota, I tripped over a canary. The dung-filled basket went up into the air, turned over and dumped its load onto my head, and onto the canary, which was smothered to death.

As it smothered, all of its powers were transferred to me, since we were both covered with the same dung, its power release flowed directly into me, eighty seven gazillion eons ago.

The transference of the canary’s power to me, (because it took place inside a super-powerful mixture of varying types of cosmic dung piles), was super-magnified and it immediately made me totally divine and omniscient.

When all was said and done, the canary had become the very first dung beetle.

I know and see everything, of course. There isn’t anything you could say or do that I won’t find out about because I can see and hear you anytime I feel like it. And even if I’m not listening, it’s still in my memory, because everything you say or do is recorded automatically and I’ll remember it at the appropriate time, guaranteed.

That’s just the “official” stuff I do. The way I spend the bulk of my time is none of your business, but suffice it to say that I do things that I find enjoyable. I never hang out with any of the other so-called “gods,” who are so egotistical, and so far below me as far as power goes. Why, I could use Medusa’s “hair” to bind all of those losers together and kick them all out of my empire completely, if I wanted.

The followers of those others, like Zeus and Hercules - they don’t bother me. Zeus is the night janitor at my palace, and Odin is my butler. In their off time, I allow them reasonable freedom to pretend to flex their “power,” since they really are no threat to me.

I have to admit, it gets to be a little boring every once in awhile, being the most powerful entity with no real peers or friends, and being able to see, do, hear, or experience absolutely anything I want at any time, even if it’s something new that I just make up.

Ah, who am I kidding; humans have no idea of the agony I go through in this position I’ve been put in through no choice of my own. All I can think of is, why me? And the worst part is, because I am invulnerable, I can end you but I can’t end me.

I’ll have to keep doing this forever, and I really don’t want to be lonely, and those other gods and goddesses are all phonies, really, so you’re good for awhile at least, unless I discover a way to end my own existence. If I find out how to do that, you’re in trouble.

_{Book of Daehtihs © free-reign 2019}

Sources for images used in this post:

_{Giant Man: Image by prettysleepy1 from Pixabay
Dung: Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay
Dung Beetle: Image by Peggy Choucair from Pixabay
Medusa: Image by WILLGARD from Pixabay}