A STRAGER INSTERED OF A FRIEND

I have not been friends with my wife for a long time

I have been sharing my home with a

stranger and its no fault of hers that she

also sees me as one.

               ***********

So getting home that day as usual,

my face bereft of friendliness, care or

empathy.

I walked in to find the house reeking of

cleanliness, she was on the sofa at the

parlour, legs crossed watching a movie.

I walked past her into the bedroom

ignoring her greetings.

We barely talk, we literally live like two

grown ups only leasing an apartment

together.

I had lost my affection for her,

it wasn't something I consciously did,

I just could not explain why I feel this

utter repugnance each time she's close by

me.

                          *******

I was still in the bedroom dressed in just

my shorts when she walked in.

' Nnam ' she said

' here is your food. '

I wanted to get angry and rebuke her,

but something pushed my attention

and I noticed she was dressed in a mini-short and a crop top.

She looked beautiful today and hyper

glamorous.

I hadn't noticed this in weeks.

She made to leave and I without thinking

stood up and held her hands.

And as soon as I touched her I regretted my decision,

for my pride nearly enveloped the fires she had rekindled within,

but it was too late to let go.

I kissed her for the first time in a long time.

She didn't hold back but selflessly

allowed her lips to hold hands with mine.

I made love to her and in the heat of passion,

guilt washed all over me and I

despairingly regretted everything I had

done to this woman.

                           ******* 

• I had not been a good man and husband.

• I had torn into tiny shreds the heart of

the only woman that had ever truly loved

me.

• I had denied her myself and given it

instead to ladies who had no regards for

marital vows.

• I had chosen gravels over the diamond

that the universe blessed me with.

                         *********

So after we made love on that day,

she looked me in the eyes and said 'Thank

you '. As she burst into sorrowful sobs.

I walked out into the bathroom, locked

myself in and cried.

I remembered the very first time I saw her,

I remembered the sway of her full hips as

she walked past me, I remembered the

fire in her eyes as I spoke to her,

the magic in her smile.

    But she didn't have just beauty,

                she had soul, 

     She had a heart as fascinating as 

               Ronaldo's goal.

I had failed as a man, I am ashamed of

myself and sorrow has occupied a room in

my soul.

Do I go left where there's nothing right?

OR

Do I turn right where there's nothing left?

         Akudo (my wealth of honour),

You have every reason to want to walk

away, every reason to not look back on

the vows we shared.

But before you leave even if you will,

             ***Please forgive me***

(picture source)(https://www.google.com.ng/search?client=ms-android-tecno&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=fMnVWtOdNsGfgAaBlqGwCg&q=black+african+couple+with+hatred&oq=&gs_l=mobile-gws-img.1.1.35i39l3.14838.15218..17014...1....0.0...........1..mobile-gws-wiz-img.....3.EQ61oSuqGvQ%3D#imgdii=yhyqw3GhL78_wM:&imgrc=QxwgQ4WJNqnRfM:)