ONE MAN'S DREAM: Ironic, black-humorous story

in story •  7 years ago  (edited)

I decided to commit suicide
I carefully studied the question
In the conditions of modern society
This is the most frequent request.

In the store I bought the book "All About Poisons"
While I was studying information in eloquent reports
I realized that I live in the wrong century
Because the described ingredients
I could not be bought in any pharmacy.

On the popular Internet forum
Everyone is on his own.
Of all the ideas was the most ''sober'' -
To cut the veins with a blade at the wrists

After that I met local hooligans
They turned out to be very humane
Without any remorse
Agreed to break all my bones

But this was not enough for me,
I calculated that poisoning with help gas
Itself did not justify.

Thought, rush under the car or what?
But I can not cause so much pain,
Let's reason, to absolutely unknown people.

Once I saw a picture in a bright magazine
Which with the others stood at the sofa
I wanted a romantic soul to have fun at last
On a fluffy spruce hang onerself.

So I planted a spruce in the yard
And every day tried on a rope on it
Seedling grew slowly
Well, what can I do ?

Time was passing gradually,
Fortunately, I had a lot of patience.
I took care of it every day
Then I celebrated my 90th birthday.

Although branches began to
touch the window
But I could hang oneself on the spruce
Only with my knees bent.

In the evening I tightened my belt
And watched as long shadow falls on the road
I will not like anything in my life anymore
And I will not abandon my dream.

translation from russian. The original of the story is here ---> МЕЧТА ОДНОГО ЧЕЛОВЕКА

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