Wearing My Soul On My Sleeve

in story •  7 years ago  (edited)

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Reflections mesmerize me, holding me hostage, occupying my attention for hours on end. Reflections of anything. Everything. Even myself.

This isn’t a narcissistic impulse. It’s me...trying to unravel a mystery and reconcile the madness. Trying to reconstruct the random fragments bombarding me from inside. Out. Constantly. Like a million unscrambled radio signals that no one else can hear.

Reflections are the physical manifestation of the chaos I swirl endlessly around with. And if I can piece them together - if I can match the colors to the feelings to the shapes of the memories - the edges just might soften and melt away. Then I might be whole again.

Safely inside myself.

Where I belong.

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This is why I like bubbles and see things in my mind inside of bubbles. It's all reflective and safe. I totally get this. But I don't have the words to explain back to you.

if I can match the colors to the feelings to the shapes of the memories - the edges just might soften and melt away. Then I might be whole again.

That part.

I’m a little jealous. I love circles and bubbles and dots. I wish I literally saw the world that way. I believe I feel it though. Experience it on many levels. And I’m sure that’s my fascination with extreme bokeh. In fact, I know it is. That’s how the world should look!

Exactly. Through the looking glass of a bubble :)

Tlingit art is all based on reflections in sea water, causing many views of the same thing. Your introspection is reminiscent and even a just tribute to this ancient style.

Very interesting. I’ve never heard that interpretation of Tlingit arts. Are you of this tribe?

No, It's something I had read about when visiting the museum archives in Victoria 20 years ago that really stuck in my head, and explains the use of mirror repetition. I could be wrong, happens all the time.

Either way, it’s a terribly romantic notion.

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