An African Proverb

I stood closely by his sick bed, watching quietly as the 96-year-old man, my grandfather, sat awake. Weakened by age and ill health, Olu as we passionately called him, could hardly move his limbs but his speech was half as good as it was when he was younger. It is often said that “old age does cruel things to the mind” but his mind had eluded this cruelty as it remained relatively sharp.

“My grandson”, Olu called, to which I responded. “life is a struggle” he says. “God has blessed you and for this you need to remain humble, for those whose palm-kernels were cracked for them by a benevolent spirit should not forget to be humble. Do not rush in life, if you rise too early, the dew of life will soak you. Many good things in life happen at a slow pace, keep in mind that the moon moves slowly but by daybreak it crosses the sky. No matter how long it takes, if the prick does not die young it shall surely taste bearded meat. The sun will shine on those who stand, before it shines on those who kneel under them, your time will surely come.

He continued “You have to appreciate every little thing that life offers you, never be ungrateful, the tortoise is not tall but it is taller than the snail; the snail is taller than the frog; the frog is taller than the lizard; the lizard is taller than the fly; the fly is taller than the ant; the ant in turn is taller than the ground on which it walks, others may not be as lucky as you are so be content. A chicken eats corn, drinks water, swallows pebbles, yet complains of having no teeth. If she had teeth, would she eat gold? Let her ask the cow who has teeth yet eats grass. If you do not value the little things life offers you, you will lose them for kola nut lasts long in the mouths of those who value it.

Sank in thoughts, I remained silent as he continued. “In life you will face a lot of challenges, do not give up because the horns cannot be too heavy for the head of the cow that must bear them and when the wood-insect gathers sticks on its own head, it carries them. Be the man that your father and I have thought you to be, try hard and you will overcome all your challenges for by trying often, the monkey learns to jump from tree to tree without falling. I have done a lot in life, your father, my son, has achieved a lot in life, you too must do your best to keep the legacy for when the chameleon brings forth a child, that child is expected to dance. Put in your best in everything you do, keep in mind that meat that has fat will prove itself by the heat of fire”

“Olu, you speak too deep”, I cut in, to which he smiles and responds, “Proverbs are the palm-oil with which words are eaten.” Then he continues. “As you excel, you will face a lot of opposition, not everybody likes you and what you do. You may not see it now; all lizards lie prostrate; you cannot tell which lizard suffers from bellyache. In time, the pain will make one of them lie flat on its back; then, shall that which has been unknown be made known but until the rotten tooth is pulled out, the mouth must chew with caution, so thread cautiously my grandson. When the frog in front falls into a pit, others behind take caution, we have had our failures, you should learn from them”

But Grandpa, you need to take a rest, you have spoken enough. “Don’t worry” he says, “There is more sleep after death.” So, he continues with his advice. “Learn to keep your successes to yourself, the secrets of the owl should not be known in daylight that is why even though the bat may hang its head downwards, it is fully aware of the way the birds fly. Be dynamic in your endeavours, keep in mind that when the hunter learns to shoot without missing, the birds learn to fly without perching.”

“Be a peace-loving person, do not pick unnecessary quarrels wherever you find yourself, for he who pelts another with pebbles, asks for rock in return.” This hit me hard since I was a culprit of squabbles. It is true that an old woman is always uneasy when dry bones are mentioned in proverbs. Though I was enjoying this overdose of proverbs from my granddad, that hit me, but then again, the toad likes water but not when the water is boiling. Olu knew about that behaviour, so he said to me, “I know some habits are hard to do away with, the snail may try, but it cannot cast off its shell but be careful who you pick fights with, it is ignorance that makes the rat attack the cat. Be respectful to your colleagues, unhealthy competition will not help, two rams cannot drink from the same bucket at the same time, they will surely lock horns. Be respectful to your superiors for a man who pays respect to the great paves the way for his own greatness.”

At this point his voice began to fade away gradually, I knew he was tired I began to suspect it was the palm wine he drunk that was speaking. Someway somehow, he sensed my suspicion, to which he laughed and said’ “it is what is in the heart when the mind is sober, that comes out of the mouth when the mind is drunk.” He wouldn’t stop talking. “My grandson, even if I am no more, I will continue to protect you, no one will hurt you, the venom of the viper does nothing to the back of the tortoise and the liver of the lion will remain vain wish for the dog. Have you ever heard of termites boast of devouring rock? I will continue to pray for you so that even when the evil-plotter beats the drum for your downfall, the gods will not let that drum sound.”

Olu started to cough, so I rushed out to get him a cup of water but joy has a slender body that breaks too soon. I got back to meet a motionless grandpa. It is sickness that a man can cure, not death. He had given up the soul.