Weddings - A photographers Perspective

in story •  7 years ago  (edited)

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As a wedding photographer, I get to experience the wedding fully in a different style. You are mostly with the couple and you get to see the fine details of the whole event. This can be intoxicating as you experience a flamboyant joyful moment all the time. But this can not be said for all weddings. Some couples fight from the beggining of the make up till the finish of the wedding reception. This has actually raised an alarm and am beginning to question the essence of wedding if all that the couple will be doing is to fight. Do some people marry their enemies?
shame-799099_1920.jpgA wedding that I recently attended. This picture has no direct link with this article and I pray for undying love for the couple.
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THE QUESTION TO BE ANSWERED.

This is a well known issue of discussion and my views are just redundancy and built upon opinions. But I am really perplexed with the turn out of some weddings. I quiet remember a couple that I photographed their wedding just some few weeks ago. How happy the two were on the day. It took me by a surprise when I heard they have filled for a divorce. I wouldn't jump into the details of the turn out of events. One thing that I know for sure is that they weren't compatible. They must have "loved" each other but were incompatible. At least, they couldnt fight their way through the marriage and resolve the issue. Is this truly love.
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I believe we have reduced love to a romantic relation and that of motivation based as such, when the romance and reasons become all archaic, the love dwindles and carries the marriage along I personally believe marriage is dependent on principles and decisions rather than just affection. Once you make up your mind on marrying an individual, you ought not to go back on your words. Most people lack this basic understanding and as such it turns out to look like there wasn't even an initial love.
This is just my perception to what brings and destroys the beautiful, ectactic experience to halt after some few days of togetherness among married couples. Join me in answering this general problem that has reduced our societies glory.

WHAT KILLS THE ONCE BEAUTIFUL AND GLORIOUS RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN MARRIED COUPLES?

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i dont believe its a matter of incompartibility but a matter of forgiveness and understanding, i have met couple who are not compatibly but learn to appreciate each other weakness and forgive quickly, this is easier said than done and if you truly love someone you will try to see the person beyond their flows

Thanks for you submission. I consider forgiveness as a property of compatibility and that forms the baseline of my initial argument.

You're so nice for commenting on this post. For that, I gave you a vote! I just ask for a Follow in return!

The bond between two humans or any other being for that matter is built, not found. Compatibility, I think, helps in the beginning when we say we fell in love with each other, on the basis of this and that ... But after that phase, compatibility does not get you to have a perfect marriage, friendship or any other relationship. It's active participation that does. It's communication. This is based on a presumption of mine, I reckon to be more true than not, that the only real issues in the world are due to miscommunication. If I am sad and you don't see it, my sadness grows. If I am sad and you do see it but are unable to say/do something, that would help me, the sadness grows still. Only if I expect of someone to stand by me, when times are tough, and he/she is able to help me in a way that I can understand and that really changes my situation, do I really see the, otherwise invisible, effort of their work. And this makes it sound simple; do good things to your friends/family/spouse and they will know you love them. But if it is put like the metaphor of Fish love, by Rabbi Dr Abraham Twerski, it seems it isn't so easy, but at the same time it is more than manageable. I have pasted the link to a video of him, i really appreciate his metaphor, its simplicity and profound message:

This one na naija stuff abii? Nice content and beautiful pictures. Wishing them HML.

It's certainly different for everyone, no two couples are exactly alike.

For some, they eventually get familiar and start to take each other for granted -- no longer making the effort to express love and attraction towards each others.

For some, perhaps their idea of love was rooted in issues of co-dependency or fear of being alone rather than True Love -- and it just wasn't enough to keep the bond together.

For some, it could have been pressure from family to get married, but in the end there might never have been love...perhaps not even attraction.

Who Knows! -- At the end of the day, I think it's important to love and value the people in our lives (even our Ex'es) for contributing to our life experience, no matter how brief or long we shared our time together.

Lotsa Love, ~Tiki

I like it so much! Great job! thank you for photos!

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I think its the modern society and social networks like Instagram and Facebook. We spend less time together and more time in virtual world that is slowly making as apart

@tj4real. You're a master comedian, do you know that? I laughed my head off when you said:

Do some people marry their enemies?

Truth is that many people go into marriage without knowing what they are walking into. They assume a lot of things and do not reach firm agreements with their partners on critical issues. But after the ceremony the hard reality stares them in the face and, being unprepared to handle them, they begin to develop dislike and loss of faith in their partners.

The fastest way for a marriage to breakdown is when free, frank, and objective communication ceases.

Solution? Marry your friend and don't expect the person to get better; instead prepare to increase your love for the person - irrespective of who he/she later becomes.

Wow. I love your input. Will put it into consideration when am getting married. I hope to host my wedding on the blockchain. Lol.

Will love to be a photographer during your wedding. That way, I can have access to watch your every mood and possibly capture it in pictures. lol.

i really like your post and i enjoy it very with all post 👍

marriage is a sacred bond between two loving beings ..
black stain from the bond is a sense of boredom until there is divorce ...

good job sir keep it up

Ya it is always good when people dont fight. Its painful to watch couples fight. I totally agree. A wedding is the last place I would expect it though how funny.

what i believe causes this is unmet expectations and lack of preparation. most people jump in because they believe they are of the right age and resources are available, without realizing the fact that one needs to be prepared mentally, and emotionally.

It's greate.

I think it is just as you've stated, it's all about understanding and accepting the truth that no one is perfect. Changes in behavior will definitely occur but through constant communications, I think anything can be solved.

Does anyone really want to marry his/her enemy at all?

nice wedding! I like it! congratulations!