My Ambitions Are Shallow But They Are Expensive

What I wanted in life is normality of my body's basic functions i.e. having no pain at all, being able to walk, chew my food and swallow my food without much difficulty, having a normal appetite which basically requires a large amount of money in order for me to achieve them.

It is because it is complicated, I needed to have my parathyroidectomy so that I could be able to get rid of my medicine that affects my appetite and well-being. I just couldn't live like this with a close to zero urge to eat, every day is just a struggle to eat and I always just force myself to eat just for me to be able to survive.

If I would get the opportunity to also have my appearance be corrected, again it will require a great deal of financing which is really beyond my expectation or dream to happen. But again I would like to have my face reconstructed if I would be given a chance.

Then there is the case about my backbone, I do think that it can be corrected too, I needed my neck to get extended as well because my backbone just pulled it down plus it had gotten the shape of an "S" over the course of years. There might be a procedure for it and I saw it done for a patient in youtube but I am not sure if they could do it here in my country. But I am sure that it is a very expensive procedure too. If I would get it done to me then it would make my life more normal in terms of breathing well and doing the former things that I was doing before.

But for now my goal was that Parathyroidectomy done, I might not be qualified anymore for it but I might insist on it if again I were to have the funds. That procedure will then make my life more eased with what I am complaining about my current situation i.e. appetiteloss and of course I will never have to cough out tons of money in buying medicines after that surgery.

There is a bit hope for my situation to get better especially if I have the necessary funds for them to be a reality and I do not care if my life would be on the line because I know that my life is worth the risk rather than to live like this where there is always misery, worry, pain, and expenses and I do not like it that way. May God help me.