It costs HOW MUCH to fuck you!?!

When I was a babyhoe (new to the industry) I took myself down to Respect QLD to find out everything I could before I put my first ad on cracker and other advertising platforms for escorts.

The woman I met with asked me what I knew about the laws in Queensland (QLD). I was honest and told her I was almost oblivious to the fact that escorting was even legal in QLD. She took the time to go through the most important QLD laws that I’d need to be aware of:

• I must work alone if I’m working from home
• It’s illegal to provide any service without protection
• Advertising laws are fucking ridiculous and seemingly arbitrarily written by pearl clutching law makers
• It’s illegal for me to keep ANY form of weapon for safety (e.g. mace, bats, knives etc)
  
  

Then Miss A asked me what I was going to charge. “Well I’m not sure, $150 an hour? Is that too much?” I’ll never forget the horror on Miss A’s face when I came out with that. “Oh no! That’s too low, you’re stunning you need to charge far more!”

Right. I needed to charge far more. But not having thought too much about it I had no clue what far more should be. I spent a few hours on escorting sites writing down the rates of escorts in my size range and area and averaged it out. Yeh, seriously, that’s how I decided my rates early on.

Back then I had no idea of the costs associated with running my business. If I made $1800 in a day I claimed it all as profit and set none of it aside. I spent it on lavish nights out with my friends. I’d work 16 hour days five days a week, then on the Saturday I’d get all of my girlfriends together, we’d all go shopping for new outfits, get our hair, make up and nails professionally done, then book ourselves into some ridiculously priced hotel and start drinking – all financed by me of course. At the time, the majority of my friends were just married, starting their families, paying off brand new mortgages or struggling with student loans, and there’s no way they could afford a night out. And look,

I loved being able to shower my friends in luxury. I bought phones, laptops, and furniture, pissed all my money up a wall and would be out drinking and partying with my friends every chance I got. I was a hot mess. Even when I was making my highest wage as a sales executive for a financial corporation it didn’t even come close to the kind of money that was flowing through my bank accounts back then. I absolutely was not equipped to deal with the responsibilities of running my own business and managing copious amounts of cash.

Within two months I was burnt out and thanks to not following the advice of every hooker I spoke to, I was also pretty much living week to week because I was too foolish to save my damn money. And I had a slight issue looming: my tax return.

One of the first pictures I used as a babyhoe. I'm fucking cringing.

What? Hookers do their taxes? [Well yeh, we do.](https://www.ato.gov.au/Individuals/Income-and-deductions/In-detail/Deductions-for-specific-industries-and-occupations/Adult-industry-workers---claiming-work-related-expenses/) But doing my taxes was NOT at the forefront of my mind when I was out living it up. I called around to a few tax agents looking for one that was “hooker friendly” and finally found one I was comfortable with. After an initial 2 hour meeting with him I wanted to vomit. I realised I’d fucked up BIGTIME. Between the income I’d made as a civillian and my hoe income that financial year, I was going to owe a fuckton in taxes. Not to mention that I hadn’t been keeping track of my business expenses. But I had one thing going for me: the detailed records keeping process for booking times and fees made for each one. I’ll leave the rest for another post about how I run my business, but safe to say, that time in my life was a lesson I’ll never forget.

I take my business quite seriously now and plan and research almost everything to do with it – including my rates. I did a deep dive into the world of escorting rates a while ago and I found myself even more confused than I was before I started. There were brothel rates, blow and go escorts, “high class companions”, “down to earth” escorts, “affordable” escorts and on and on. But I couldn’t figure out what the difference was between each escort type - besides one thing: price. Most had professional photos, nice in calls, offered the same services, and for the most part were all genuine and lovely people. So what’s a hoe to do?

I figured out what my business and personal expenses were, worked out how many bookings I’d be willing to do a week to get my base rate, rounded it out to the nearest hundred and that’s pretty much what I’ve stuck with for years now. I’ve fluctuated up and down once or twice for various reasons but this is where I’ve stayed, and I’m happy with it. It’s what I’m comfortable charging. I’ve realised that charging less or more than other escorts doesn’t make me less or more valuable. It most certainly doesn’t dictate the level of service you will or won’t receive from me. It also doesn’t mean that this is the dollar value I’ve placed on my body. But it IS the dollar value I’ve placed on my time and services.

One thing that hasn’t changed over the years though, is the detractor’s. As a babyhoe I received my first piece of anonymous hate mail within a month of my escorting fulltime. I’ll never forget it, because at the time it really upset me and it was a huge blow to my self-confidence.

“Your *[sic]* no way near quality enough to be a prostitute”

I replied to the anon with “haters gonna hate” and a cute gif, Showing them and my followers that I didn’t care! I’m a strong independent hooker! But in reality I was hurt and even though I was making an insane amount of money and received compliments daily, I started to doubt whether or not I should continue being a Sex Worker. I quickly learned though that this person wouldn’t be the last. And it didn’t matter how I looked, what I charged, how old I was or what my incall looked like. There would always be those that will try to tell me I can’t possibly be worth what I charge. In the last week alone I’ve had one client tell me I don’t charge enough but also, this charming encounter with a follower on twitter. It took me a while to realise that the old adage of “You get what you pay for” doesn’t apply to the world of Sex Work. Hookers come from all walks of life and our rates are not synonymous with our value as a human being or service provider; nor are they indicative of our appeal to men.

And as the great Dita Von Teese once said:

Miss Vee xoxo

Addendum:
1. I cant find a reference for Sex Workers being unable to keep weapons. I know I didn't hallucinate this bit of information because Miss A took me through some other household items I can use to protect myself in an emergency. I'm going ask around though and if I find and update I'll post about it.
2. Miss A is a pseudonym I've chosen to protect her privacy