So what if we are NOT Babes?

Source

Last week I caught up with an old girlfriend (who happens to be a mom and runs a small business) over a cuppa in Bangsar.

She was having some hiccups with her business and needed some advice. It has been a while since we last chat about life and what we are up to anyways.

Gladly, we met and chatted for hours until she shared a story about her going to a networking party last year where earlier she learnt that some potential investors might be attending. The invitation that was forwarded by another friend on Facebook. She didn’t know what to expect but would love to explore the event with an open heart. She was keen on making new friends and learn a thing or two about business – so might as well go.

It was indeed an eye opening experience for her. Not because of the sharing sessions or making new friends, but the way people treated her because she’s not a…BABE. My friend has always been a simple person even since our corporate days.

Source

Since most of the guests that came were men, she could clearly see most of them prefer to chat up with (attractive) young women. Although she tried to be approachable, smiling and saying hellos and even have small chats with the guests, most of it were cut short as soon as young women came into the picture. Didn’t want to be rude (it’s a networking event after all), naturally everyone is welcome to chat with anyone.

She tried getting into the conversations and making herself ‘relevant’, however the attention will somehow diverted to the young women and the last thing she realises that the conversation is no longer about business but more about personal hobbies and about who’s who they know in the Startups.

She left the event earlier than expected and feeling rather upset. We both agreed that nobody would even notice that she had left.

Source

She admitted that most of the ladies that attended the event was rather young and polished, in their heels, branded handbags, dresses, full make up and perfect blown hair. While she’s in her mommy jeans, blouse, flats and Jacqui & Gin bag. She has not even lose some of her pregnancy weight yet. It made her feel inadequate. I asked if some of these ladies talk to her, surprisingly none. Even the ladies prefer to be in the group of young women that looks good.

I recalled my first networking event 2 years ago and had similar experience. Although I wasn’t in my mommy jeans, I dressed up pretty decent too – well, in my working pants, flats and a sling bag, very light make up and a ponytail.

I was in the same situation. The moment I opened my mouth about the business that I do (dealing with moms and women), the guests doesn’t seem to relate much. They are more into apps, tech talks and getting close to VCs to get into their good books. Yup, they literally swarmed every VC fellows at the event like bees to honey!

Inexperienced and naïve, it was my first and last random networking event I ever attended too.

Source

SO WHAT IF WE ARE MOMS AND NOT BABES?

What’s wrong with us going to a networking event wearing clothes that we are comfortable with? Do we have to dress up like babes and flip our hairs to get attention? Do we have to smile with twinkles in our eyes, bite our lips and hold champagne glass in our hand so you will talk to us longer?

Source

It’s like the moment we become mothers, suddenly we are labelled as “unattractive” people to be around or seen with.

Here’s a News flash! We may not be babes, but we deserve a chance to be noticed and heard too. Not for our superficial appearance but more for our ideas, experience and business preposition.

It is unfortunate that most investors were men these days. Can’t blame men for their tendency to look at pretty young things. But for goodness sake, this is a business event (or so we thought) and not a match making event - so stay focus and stick to the objective.

We live in a world where we are constantly judged (and accepted) by how we looked like or how much money you make or how smart you are or even by fame. To fit in you must meet a certain criteria. So if we don't strive to meet the criteria, we are hopeless and at the losing end?

Source

So I told my friend, we hope to organise more women networking events soon under our platform. Women of all shapes, statuses can come to network in their own skin with no judgement. Where you don’t have to be a babe to get attention. We hope to grow more Women investors in our platform too, so women can support women in their ventures, big or small.

Of course men are welcomed to join our events anytime. Don’t worry, we won’t judge you. And you don’t have to have dreamy eyes, athletic body to fit in.

I really hope someday we will all stop stereotyping and categorizing Mothers as nurturers only. And no, they are not less attractive just because they behave like Moms or dress up like Moms.

For all you know there are many successful mothers out there who owns a class of their own (they are no longer in babe category) that are talented too. From Ariana Huffington, Jessica Alba, Gwyneth Paltrow, Angelina Jolie, Beyonce and Madonna to name a few – they are all mothers and have successful businesses. They have all come a long way!

Source

Mothers or not, we are all women. Sure we are not some Miss Universe or Miss Cheongsam Chinatown, but don’t judge us by our superficial looks but rather our ideas and determination to make things work. We are just like any other business people or entrepreneurs trying to make it out there too. We too are not perfect and go through the same trials of ups & downs. Some of our businesses makes money, some fail and some earns decent income.

Judge us not for what we wear, most of us may not wear heels, dressed in sexy outfits and flip hairs, but in all honesty, we dress up decently as any mother would. As mothers, our priorities have change, it is all about family and bringing food to the table now. Slowly we let go of all things that we once feel good about. It is no longer about what shoe brand or the latest hairstyle technique. It doesn't mean we don't love ourselves enough to look good. It's because we just put our priorities differently and only focus on what matters.

Source

The next time you go to an event and meet a mom, don’t treat her any different, listen to her ideas and if it’s cordial, there is nothing wrong to explore further. Just because she is a Mother, doesn’t mean she only knows how to cook and clean homes. She can be a badass business woman too if you hear her out and give her a chance.

angiechin28

Something About Angiechin28

Angie Chin is an Alpha Mom with a mission and founder of WonderWomen.Asia (coming soon), the first online portal in Malaysia that connects Women to affordable online learning, community activities, shareable contents, events, jobs and go-to market opportunities. At home, she’s a mommy to a 10 year old daughter, 6 furbabies + a grown babe. She loves travelling, cooking, exploring new food, reading and watching re-runs on Youtube.

Regularly posting up her ramblings and sharing contents (current favorities is Facebook & Instagram), she fell head over heels with Steemit after realising it’s the only platform that allows ANYONE to earn cryptocurrency by creating and posting up contents, even by liking, voting or commenting other people’s contents!

whatever you do on the platform, you will earn. Isn’t that awesome?

To start earning, sign up for Steemit already! Post up your original contents and you can almost start seeing the ka-ching in your account before you know it. Best of all, it is FREE (Love the word FREE).

Life tagline (for now): Never be afraid to try anything once!

Drop her a note at [email protected]