Image Source - Pixabay
I wrote a post recently and got a comment from Meredith that said many people misdefine several things as love and she was absolutely right. Human beings are social by nature; we were definitely not created to live in a vacuum or to be solitary. We need other human beings for love, companionship and other relationships. My 12-year-old daughter asked me a question about love and relationships that I couldn't ignore. I felt the issue was too mature for her but still I chose not to freak out and look beyond her seemingly simple question to the emotional turmoil that must have been going on in her young mind. The ensuing discussion inspired this article.
Have you ever experienced such a thing as meeting someone and connecting almost instantly? Ever had that moment when the chemistry is off the charts and the attraction is mutual? Within minutes, you are laughing and talking as though you've been friends for eons. Without much ado, your mind begins to generate possibilities of a happily-every-after. You begin to imagine that he or she could be the "one". The attraction is almost total and you feel like the person has got the perfect look, the perfect dress sense and style, the perfect accent and so on. You kinda zone out of the fact that the individual is a complete stranger who's probably putting his or her best foot forward to create a great first impression.
You focus on the peripherals of the way you are feeling and on the fact that you are having an amazing time with him or her. Soon enough, you part ways but exchange cell phone numbers and or social media handles with the promise to keep up the conversation thread. You then try to nurture the connection by calling and or texting but your only response is silence. He or she doesn't pick up your calls nor reply any of your texts until you slowly begin to feel like a fool. I bet this happens to everyone at some point or the other. It begins during that tender teenage period when the hormones are raging all over the place and emotions are driving you crazy. Lol.
It is necessary to face reality and realize that attraction and chemistry are as inevitable as they are fickle. They are definitely not the definition nor the beginning of true love. Young and inexperienced people make the mistake of assuming it is love at first sight and end up getting hurt. Time, wisdom and experience have revealed that an instant connection with someone isn't a sign of a likely romance. It is just proof that you are as red-blooded and as human as everyone else.
It is also a sign that such an individual could be your kind of person with whom you could develop a meaningful long-lasting friendship or relationship. It is wiser and safer not to assume anything about new relationships. Everyone will meet someone with whom they connect; some would stay with us and some wouldn't. Only time will tell which is which. So my advice to my daughter and other young people is to be friendly but not irrational, keep things simple and talk to older, more mature and trustworthy people about your feelings i.e parents, siblings, mentors, etc. They'll help put things in the right perspective so you don't get carried away or make a grave mistake.