Working decisions and running on

For coming up to two years, I have been pushing myself pretty hard on Steem. Well, pretty hard on many ways. There is the saying about burning the candle at both ends, but what happens if it is not a candle at all and instead a stick of dynamite?

For what will soon be 40 years, I have lived a life of economic hardship, much of it self-inflicted through not taking opportunities that arose. Most of my missed opportunities were due to fear, fear of failure, fear of success. Fear to fail publicly.

I decided to put an end to my fears and instead shoot high because regardless off how much work it takes, a life running from fear and debt is a harder life to live. If I am going to fail, it will now be from action, not crushing death from inactivity.

To be active though takes energy, takes resources. No matter how one looks at life and possibility, the current environment needs value to have influence. The last two years has helped me create a little pool of resources that give me some options to move. To collect this pool has taken work, it has been a risk.

Last December, I could have paid my apartment off and been debt free, now I can't even come close to that and am further in debt, although I have another year of work on top, another year of powering up. I am not the only one who had done this, but there really aren't many as everyone needs to live. There is a risk in both paths.

I am taking the risk that the Steem will work, cryptocurrency will mainstream and my little pool of value will be worth a great deal more, potentially much more than the two years of work coukd earn me elsewhere. If it fails of course, it will be devastating but, I would have lost two years of work and be in the same position as if I hadn't worked at all. Still running.

Someone asked me, what is the point to life, why not just suicide? and I believe life is largely pointless other than the purpose we give it. If someone is willing to accept death and take their own life, where is the harm in trying to succeed and failing? Death is still there as an option.

Sounds morbid but it isn't. If we pre-accept and come to absolute terms with the failure, we are free to really act. This is the empowering factor of simulation theory also as if this life is all a simulation, what risk is there, what does failure mean? What does the enforced debt cycle become when we decide to no longer recognise it as valid? What are we fearful of, what are we running from?

It is interesting to note that so much of our suffering and fear is in theory only, held concepts that we have decided as individuals and groups to validate and inforce. It really is a strange world we have created to inhabit. A world of conflict and contradiction, internally as one and externally as groups. Self-inflicted existence.

A lot of people have had and I believe many more will have opportunity on Steem to take some control of their life experience and improve themselves and their world. But it is a risk and a great deal of difficulty involved. One thing that will always remain true though and that is that very rarely will help come to those unwilling to truly help themselves. Help received is an act of grace, not an entitlement and it may never come, much like luck.

We spend a lot of time worrying about value but not too much thinking of values. We want freedom but not the responsibility. Reward but no risk. We want to have access to resources but are found lacking when asked to put into the pool for others. To have abundance in life for all takes the work of all, not the expectation it is always available.

At least for now while we are decision-makers, we need to make decisions for our path forward and they aren't often easy. Are they worth it? Time will tell but every step taken comes with the potential of risk and reward. Every step not taken limits reward, but not necessarily risk.

Some thoughts before work and a little more running. Running toward something or away is the question.

Taraz
[ a Steem original ]
_{(posted from phone)}