How living in paradise for 5 months put me into a depression.

I am Dominican by nationality. Dominican Republic is a beautiful tropical country and since I go every year, this proves that I cant get enough. Every time I went on vacation, I wanted to stay forever.

I took a trip to Cabarete, a beautiful city filled with expats in Dominican Republic, in February 2017. I instantly fell in love, I loved the people, and the way of life everything was so laid back. This was my first exposure to expatriates. I was wondering how I could also move to the Caribbean, work online and enjoy the white sand and hot sun on a day to day basis.

Then while on vacation, I met the gym owner of most popular gyms in Cabarete. What a coincidence, I felt as this was heaven sent. Since I am a personal trainer I asked him if there were any jobs available, he said yes and that we will stay in contact. And that we did!

A few months later, I was living in the Dominican Republic with my boyfriend @spenceryan. When I got there I loved it, honestly theres pros and cons of living in a 3rd world country. Its beautiful, and yes, its fun but its also a really hard thing to do. in order to start this post on a positive note, and let me show you some of the things that I enjoyed the most while living in The Dominican Republic.

The beach setting made it amazing for pictures, I was out enjoying the sunset and sunrise daily.

Who doesn't love drinking piña coladas on the beach?

I had an amazing view from my balcony, I would sit down on my rocking chair, read books and drink wine.

Exploring and finding new places.

Drinking fresh coconut water.

(Sunrise gif made by me)

Since we were on a budget, we didn’t move smack down in the middle of the city. We were approximately 10 minutes away by car or motorcycle. Since cars are all imported, they are SUPER expensive so we decided to settle for a motorcycle.

Thats when our bad luck started.

We got this amazing deal on a bike, and the very same day we went to the gym for a workout. Thats when we got into an accident. It wasn’t BAD, but it could have been worse. By the grace of god we didn’t loose our lives that day, and all we received were road rashes and ankle sprains. We fell right in the middle of the street and didn’t collide with another car or bike.

Lives are lost on that same road on a daily basis. Lets talk statistics:
95 lives are lost each year per 100,000 inhabitants. Thats 10,224 deaths per year. Its no secret that Dominican Republic is one of the top countries with a high car-crash death rate.

Heres a pic of my unhealed road rash on my elbow which they call "Dominican tattoos.” It took about two weeks to heal, and also got infected.

So after the accident, we stopped going to the gym on the motorcycle all together. And if any of you know me at all, you would know I don’t shut up about fitness. Thats when my excitement for living in the Dominican Republic started to fade. I had no gym, source of income and way to get around.

However, we made the best of it anyway. I was able to still workout, and since that meant no gym equipment I learned how to be more creative by using resistance bands and use the resources I had around me. But, even though I was working out 4x a week, I was gaining weight. Dominican Republic has amazing fresh fruit which I enjoyed some of every day!

I gained 25lbs during my stay, and no it wasn’t my diet, it was my lack of activity. I went from living in New York City, having two jobs, and family/friend gatherings every week to doing nothing. My body wasn’t used to just laying back and taking it easy. My activity decreased drastically and this impacted my weight a lot! No matter what I did the pounds were just packing on!

A few other issues we faced was the electricity price, the wifi sucked so much that it took forever to upload videos on instagram and there were nights that we couldn’t watch Netflix. We also went through two hurricanes (Irma, Maria). I know everything sounds minuscule, and these are definitely complaints of a first world millennial. I was just bored out of my mind, I went down a downward spiral. I felt worthless, and I was becoming more and more depressed.

You know you are depressed when you wake up in paradise and you don’t want to get out of bed. I felt as if I had no purpose, I literally had nothing to do and it was driving me insane. I also felt undeserving of what I had, people work for a lifetime and THEN retire. I haven’t accomplished anything big, had zero dollars in my bank account, no job, no friends there, therefore why should I get to basically retire?

We decided it was in our best interest to leave the Dominican Republic and move back to New York where I have a sense of purpose again. Jk, we moved back for the wifi and chain restaurants. I loved, and still do love Dominican Republic, but I am happier living in New York! Maybe if I had a Steemit account, I would of has a better sense of purpose. Maybe. But, I don't regret the experience and am a true believer that everything happens for a reason. I felt as if I hit a huge reset button on my life. I was able to really realize what are the things that I actually value, which is fitness and helping others, friends and family, and my health.