William Southold, The Southold Report
Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, perhaps reacting to some bad press as a result of disclosures in the Mueller Report regarding her lying, lost her cool on Sunday. Our reporter caught up to her coming out of church, and asked if President Trump was truly happy.
“Goddamn it!,” she snapped. “The President has never been happier! I’ve never seen . . .”
“But what about his angry tweets this weekend?” our reporter interrupted.
“Would you . . .” she responded. “Why do you people keep lying about him! The President is happy! He’s overjoyed! He’s happy and he knows it! Just because the president likes to show it by stomping his feet and shouting, you people in the fake news go crazy! Get a grip!”
Sadly, this whole exchange occurred out of earshot and camera range of our film crew, the whole lot having stopped by Starbucks to get a celebratory Easter latte.
Central News Service, proudly bringing you the fakest news anywhere, featuring our very own Pulitzer Prize winning Fake Newsman, William Southold
(CNS Disclaimer: Mr. Southold has in no way won the Pulitzer Prize.)
P.S. Here’s something I came across the other day, thought it was worth passing along to all you English junkies:
“A well constructed sentence arrives to the ear as a beautiful song, to be sung again and again, as it is passed along.”
(Images from GoodFreePhotos and Wikimedia Commons)