How To Steal From Walmart, Easy!

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Now before I get into this tutorial, I want to be clear. I am not saying it is a good idea to steal from Walmart, or even from any store or individual for that matter. I am not saying that I do it, and I am not saying that I have ever done it. I'm just providing information on how to go about doing this.

If you are going to steal, it might as well be from Walmart. Stealing something that doesn't belong to you is morally wrong. When you steal from an individual, they will surely notice it. When you steal from huge corporations like Walmart, it virtually doesn't even leave a scratch. You aren't even an annoying mosquito buzzing around to them. You are more like microscopic bacteria that they will never even notice. So if you have to steal, steal from Walmart, not your neighbor.

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That being said, all Walmarts have complete boyscout (and girlscout) employees. They are told to crack down on any suspicion of theft. It is easy to steal from Walmart, but that doesn't mean that you won't get caught. They are a few precautions that you must always take when stealing from Walmart, and you can't get lazy with these rules.

1. Make sure that you are not in anyone's line of sight

This one should be completely obvious. Make sure than no one is looking at you. This includes more than just the employees. Secret shoppers are paid to walk around and watch out for shoplifters. You don't want any liabilities.

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2. Make sure that you are not in the line of sight of any camera

This one should also be obvious. I have heard that Walmart has a secret facial recognition software. True or not, you don't want anyone to have evidence of you stealing. Look for black orbs on the ceiling. These are cameras. Find certain isles that are blind spots to these cameras. You can also get sneaky by reaching your hands into the isles and turning your back to the cameras while ripping open a package.

Cameras can look like any of these:

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3. Act normal

If you are incapable of keeping your cool while stealing, then you should not be stealing in the first place. This means that you don't seem to be in a rush, you don't mind talking to people for a short amount of time, and you aren't acting any differently than you normally would. Feel free to pull out your phone and text. You can even call a friend of you don't want anyone stopping you to talk.

Be cool.

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Now that we have that out of the way, we can dive in. Just remember to always go by those rules. Don't get lazy! First off, know what you want to steal, even before you go inside. You don't need to be stealing things just for kicks. Only steal if you legitimately want it. These could be CDs, HDMI cables, pens, soap, and plenty more. If you are just stealing something small such as pens or sharpies, you can usually just stick your hands in an isle, rip open the package, and put them in you pocket. Electronics can be a little more tricky.

Here is a good tip. Wear belts like this:

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These belts are adjustable to just about any width on the spot. You can place objects like CDs under your pants right above or on your crotch. Tighten the belt to hold it. This area is the least likely to get felt up by another person (not that anyone pats you down except police officers; if anything, you can still empty your pockets if you are stopped). It helps to wear a jacket in case a lump is semi-visible around your crotch area... One that is a little too large ;)

Let's take CDs for example. Sometimes, CDs will have a magnetic strip in the package that sets off alarms at the entrances. Once you have your item concealed, CD in this case, make your way to one of the restrooms. Once you are there, get in a stall and lock it. Open up the package and remove any metal strips.

This is what the metal strips look like:

For CD cases, they are usually behind the plastic part that holds the CD. Take the CD out and pry open the back cover. Be thorough and look all over. You may want to wait until no one is in the restroom; you don't want anyone to figure out what you are doing. Put the case back together and into your pants. If you opened up the package for an HDMI cable or something similar, you can stuff the package into the toilet paper dispenser. This will keep it hidden long enough for you to leave the store.

If you want to steal something bigger, such as TVs, I don't have much advice for you. Maybe go to a smaller store and catch the truck while its at the loading dock.

One more thing! The absolute easiest way to steal from Walmart is at the self checkout. You can get about half of your items free if you are sneaky enough. Grab two items at a time and quickly run them over the scanner. Make sure one of the items is scanned so everyone hears that beep! You may want to hold the unscanned item until you scan the next item. The computer will complain to you if it senses an unexpected item. It will shut up after a second. Just pretend that you are getting frustrated with the machine. This doesn't happen too often though. The best part is that if you get caught (which you won't), just explain to the employees that you were having a hard time with the machine and you didn't realize that it wasn't scanned. They will let you go back and pay for it.

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Remember kiddos, stealing is bad, mmkay? I don't advise this lifestyle!

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