I don't want to be alive

in twinflames •  6 years ago 

I don't want to be Alive
I just want to be yours and you be mine
I'm exhausted from trying to figure out what you want
I'm not sure you even want to be mine
I keep running into walls trying to find
What was the reason I'm even alive
I want you
I need you
I love and adore you
My chest feels like I'm going to disintegrate
I'm afraid of Loving
I'm tired of living without loving right
I'm going out of my mind
You think I'm a fools pride
I just want to forget what makes me pain
I want another life
I want no pain
No hurting anyone
Not everyone wants everything
I just want to be loved and appreciated
I just want you to see me. Forgive me
For things I do out of my own mind
From fears that I swear I didn't want as my own.
I'm not loveable
I'm too sensitive of a kind
I don't know myself anymore
Every time I find her she's chasing dreams
That will never ever be.
I'm tired of wishing
Tired of wanting.
I just want to be me.
I keep coming back to you.
Trying to find myself.
I get lost in transition.
I'm not who you think I am.
I'm weak.
I cannot stand.
That I'm even alive.
Too much pain.
No one to recreate it.
I'm horrible at being.
I just am.
6.16.18 LRN

Artwork by Myself
Penname
Lyrix Rain
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