Source pixabay
You can keep um.
I'm not interested in your big shiny engines with 35,000bhp. leather seats that just make you sweat more. And who needs a built-in sat-nav when google maps knows the way. Why would I want reverse park sensors with rear view camera? I've got eyes in my head and mirrors on the door.
How much?!
Damn dude! I could live for 5 years on the money that BMW cost. The insurance most be through the roof. Naa... you can keep it, I don't want one, it's just not for me!
I'll take this...
Yes! That's it. That's my car. That beautiful old rattly box of rusty nuts and bolts. It's bought. It's paid for. It's mine, mine, my crappy box of shit on wheels. No HPI outstanding, no monthly payments to make.
It's fine you can go ahead and laugh
I don't care!
So what the propshaft is missing and it won't do 4 wheel drive any more. The front two wheels still pull it along. Maybe it is a pain in the ass to start some times... but it still starts, eventually. And what if the clutch is a bit stiff - it still works just enough to change the gears.
It needed some loving
It failed the MOT (Ministry of transport road safety test) and need a few bits. That's ok. It's old, the spares are quite cheap.
It didn't need much...
The front down pipe for the exhaust
Had that fitted in about 20 minutes
A ball joint - I know it sounds painful but its not that bad
That one took a while to fit.
New set of wipers
Ha, I'm not gonna take a photo of those... their like the two new tyres- Boring!
And back we go for the 'Retest'
Failed again! - Emissions - SHIT!
(Co2 levels exiting exhaust too high)
Ok, I'll get a new cat.
No dude... Not That Sort!
Yes, one of those. 😎👍
And it's passed - Wahoo!
The big bonus...
This bad boy runs on gas. Ok American folks, I hear ya... so does mine! - umm no, I mean LPG or propane if you like.
I can get 200 miles in this thing for 20 quid... let me see you do that in your Bently or Pontiac with the big bore exhaust.
Anyway... I'm off for a spin
Catch you later dude's and dudette's.
Ah... just before I go -
The Rules for #comedyopenmic say pick on 2 other deserving steemians.
Ok then, let's see who from my awesome group of followers are paying attention...
I'm gonna pick on: @boboxer and @enternamehere
Thanks for reading 👍
Regards and best wishes @sivehead
I love it. I myself drive a diesel jetta that pumps out 50 miles per gallon. No idea how far that is in measurements that countries that haven't been to the moon use. Just kidding. lol . NIce post. love the cat reference.
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Ahhh.... was that you I saw the other day...
Lol... look out for those new mot regs mind!
Thanks for visiting @doomsdaychassis
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We call that rolling coal in the states. Every redneck puts a tune on their truck to make it do that.
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Really?!... here in the uk, they've recently altered the law so that if your diesel vehicle lets out even the slight puff of visible smoke, it's deemed unroadworthy.
Apparently it's not good to breathe that shit!... who know?!
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Nah.. it’s all you dude. You made me laugh a long time ago. I’m not surprised by that reward or this reward at all. You’re funny @sivehead, own it. I’m sure neither of your posts are done generating yet either. Congrats!
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Thanks @dandays. I can't let it go to my head though, our doorways are only two foot six wide!
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Hi sivehead,
Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating, this will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied.
Judges:
If you have any questions or quieries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here
Thank you to @matytan for the great banner
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Congratulations @sivehead! You have completed the following achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :
Click on the badge to view your Board of Honor.
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STOPTo support your work, I also upvoted your post!
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This is mine.. watcha think?
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That's awesome dude. Do you sell pulled pork burgers out the back?
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Lol funny funny. Ill still take that McLaren
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You're welcome to it... just long press the photo and select 'download image'! 😜
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I aint downloading that crap 😝
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Lol. Awww what's the problem... not shiny enough for you?
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They see me rollin
They hatin
Patrolling they tryin to catch me ridin' dirty ......
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Ummm... Ok!
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That crappy box of shit on wheels, is beautiful.
Although I still wish you'd taken THE cat.
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Damn right it is 👍- sounds awesome too... kind of a roaring cough-spluttery-chugg... a way better noise than THE cat could ever make!
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Yeah fuck THE cat!
#backpedaling
xD
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