I’m seeing people I admire fighting for a cause. That doesn’t mean I’m able to replicate their results.

Photo by Hrvoje_Photography 🇭🇷 on Unsplash

Most of the time the advice is the same: build a community! Volunteer! Advocate! Vote! Stand up to Oppressors!

I’m sick of that advice. I’m on the spectrum. I’m partially faceblind. I’m an awkward Veteran. Thanks to my background, my skill set mostly involves math and violence. My career was in Military Automation, then Manufacturing Automation. Since I struggle with human connection, I’ve been most comfortable when alone with a robot.

Is there ethical automation? Equitable Automation? Sure. But I’ve only ever experienced extractive automation, or putting robots in the place of humans.

Corporations Are Not Good Humans

People like Milton Hershey are a dying breed. Hershey famously removed a steam shovel from one of his work sites when he was told it could do the work of 40 men. His response? Turn that off. Go hire 40 men.

I’ve had to specifically fight against corporations who were comfortable having workers in environments so toxic that their eyes had trouble functioning. The same environments where safeties had been disabled to maximize profits. Environments where a single spark would have immediately killed a minimum of 6 people. It took the literal threat of OSHA/Press/Union involvement for the corporation to take me seriously.

In one of my proudest moments, a supervisor threatened my employment. I leaned across his desk and roared, “THEN FUCKING FIRE ME. But this ISN’T going away.” Fortunately (for his saving face) the ‘Vid shut down the plant within a week. This bought us more than enough time to correct the issue without causing weeks of downtime.

A few months later I left the job, having enough funds saved up to take some time and address the course my life was taking. It gave me a chance to reflect on my career choices, and the effect my work has on people and the planet.

Hellbent on Doing the Right Thing

Now I’m out of money. I could go back to work in the manufacturing industry and immediately solve my financial problems.

I have a crisis of conscience, though. Every step I take in that career furthers the extractive process of capitalism. It’s not sustainable. Eventually there simply won’t be enough left to go around.

The main strategy we can use is to build sustainable communities, protecting and caring for the people around us. As these communities grow, they can effectively leverage their collective influence to create change. But I’ve been unsuccessful in building even a small community, since even my presence in public puts most people on edge.

Pictured: Me thinking about cuddling puppies and how flowers are nice

Since I’ll apparently be functioning solo for the foreseeable future, how do I fight the current status quo? I’m a 6+ft mustachioed man with a permanent grumpy-bear face, who has trouble recognizing faces, doesn’t catch social cues, and usually says inappropriate things in public.

Where is my community? Where do I stand to actually make a difference in the world around me?

I’m still searching, and I refuse to stop. In the meantime, I’ll try to scrape together enough cash to survive another 30 days. The alternative is accepting that our burning planet will only get worse until we all starve, and yolo my ass into the void.

Be good to each other. We still have a chance.
Sisyphus Bones