The End of All Things :: A Short Story :: 'What Would You Do' contest entry

negativer (62) in whatwouldyoudo • 7 years ago (edited)

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_{This is an entry for @dreemit's What Would You Do Writing Challenge

_{Title image by @negativer using Canva and image from
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7 years ago by negativer (62)

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prydefoltz (65) · 7 years ago (edited)

An amazingly gripping story, Negativer. A little short on compassion for his poor wife though. What she did was an act of love and one that most would not have found the courage to do. I don't think I could have. Michael on the other hand took the cowards way and kept the meteor a secret and did nothing. Is obedience and meekness more valued in the eyes of this 'rock god' than courage and bravery? I wonder. I'd rather hang with a God with a little more compassion and understanding. I may be doomed ...lol:)

Again the story was marvellous:)

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2 votes

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

A thoroughly insightful take on it. To some extent I did want to imply how arbitrary the rules of 'salvation' and 'damnation' might be, especially for certain religions that put so much weight on 'acts and deeds' versus what is truly in one's soul.

I am so glad you found the mother's decision to be an act of love, since in its simplest form that is really all it was. She did not know what she was giving up by doing it. The act was certainly painful for her as a mother, but she did it for her children to spare them from something worse.

Thank you so much for reading, and your thoughts!

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prydefoltz (65) · 7 years ago

I look forward to your tales:)

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dreemit (71) · 7 years ago (edited)

Nice twist!! Though I hope if there is a God like that one, he would recognize her heart was in the right place ;)

Love this take and your writing style, definitely going to check out your page!

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

I'd like to believe there is a merciful God as well, and gray areas like this where you do the wrong thing for the right reasons won't condemn you forever.

Thanks for reading!

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anikekirsten (56) · 7 years ago

Oh, wow. Loved this, Neg! I did not see that ending or the ending after, or the last ending. Awesome. And quite the interesting take on the rapture.

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

Thanks @anikekirsten! I hope if the rapture does come we'll have a little more time to plan for it than just 4 days. At least 7 days, so our last posts can make their final payout :)

Thx for reading!

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1 vote

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anikekirsten (56) · 7 years ago

Hahaha. Yes, that final payout makes the difference, if only for the OCTendancies of having matter complete.

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carolkean (66) · 7 years ago

"It shouldn't take an apocalypse to make people right with their God and their family. They should be living their lives at peace already." True. And yet the alcoholic must hit rock-bottom before facing the fact "I need help," and most "Changed Lives" evangelicals tell us they had hit rock bottom before God took over and transformed them. Great story, Neg! Great, as in well written, as always, riveting, powerful, hard hitting and BRUTAL, brutal, brutal. Wow! You pack a wallop! If only you didn't write so well, I would be able to resist reading you. :)

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

As always, you are spot on in your insight; people always take the easy way out and think they can do it their own way...until they reach the bottom doing it their own way and they have no other choice but to reach out.

Thanks much for reading! :)

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2 votes

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carolkean (66) · 7 years ago

My pleasure! (er, pain!)

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caleblailmusik (56) · 7 years ago

What the actual...?
Ugh. Frick Negativer, this was a good story. I definitely did not see a Left Behind twist, but it also was bizarrely human and awful. Like, God comes and people kill their children and selves out of fear. It's such a bizarre juxtaposition and I sorta love it.

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

Thanks! I wanted to write it longer, to kind of drag out the last days a bit, but...steemit attention span and all that talked me out of it. As it was, it ended up wrapping up pretty quick, and I would have wanted to spend more time making a statement about how all the 'works' and 'good deeds' that people do that they think are buying themselves an entry into some kind of heaven or afterlife really is meaningless to the God of the Universe.

Thx for reading!

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1 vote

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caleblailmusik (56) · 7 years ago

Ya know, I've had new thoughts on that. Sure, good works/deeds won't get you in but, as Christians, it's kinda senseless to spend all our time in worship or trying to "sell God" to people. Christian means to live Christ-like, so doesn't that include loving those we wouldn't usually love or feeding the poor and uplifting our neighbors? Through kind, sincere acts, His light and movement will have room to grow or whatever.
I got preachy, lolz.
Thanks for prompting discussion?

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

Right, I agree with all that. But praising God 24/7 is still often a 'deed' that someone thinks they can use to earn safe passage (and a lot of it ends up just helping you feel self-righteous for the amazing amount of prayer you did today and oh boy look at me in my passionate worship)

I'm no expert, but my position is that when you take God/Christ/the Lord into your heart, your works will speak for themselves, and you will be a light to the world. As a result, you would want to act as Christ would act, and all the care/love/help of others is just naturally part of that. You don't do it to 'rack up points', you do it because the Holy Spirit works in you, and you want to do it to please Him. (or some variation of that)

I don't fully believe all that, to be honest, but I'd like to.

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2 votes

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caleblailmusik (56) · 7 years ago

I hope you do eventually bud. That was beautiful (without being schmucky, wipes tear).

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trishlarimer (42) · 7 years ago

Oh God! Dang it, Negativer. I take a long break from steemit and come back to be smacked with what I have been missing ...terrible...wonderfully gripping story. Excellent...horrible LOL

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

Welcome back! And sorry :)

Thanks for reading!

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1 vote

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johnkingwriter (54) · 7 years ago

Nice one Neg. Kept me guessing 'til the end. Dark though, but then, that's your hallmark.

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1 vote

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robbieretard (48) · 7 years ago (edited)

OMG excellent read. Tears in my eyes right up until "It hovered" and then I knew the game was up. Would make a great TV episode for Black Mirror or similar.

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

I'm glad you liked it! I tried to keep the 'twist' as long as possible. Thanks for reading!

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1 vote

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karinxxl (68) · 7 years ago

Dude... I was racing over the story curious what would happen next.

Sad man...so super sad :(

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1 vote

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negativer (62) · 7 years ago

Thanks for reading!

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